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 Drunk Again
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Passions in Poetry

Drunk Again ( the reason i left for so long)

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Clockwork_Orange
Senior Member
since 03-23-2007
Posts 623
Space Camp, IN


0 posted 07-09-2009 07:21 PM       View Profile for Clockwork_Orange   Email Clockwork_Orange   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions   Click to visit Clockwork_Orange's Home Page   View IP for Clockwork_Orange

well for some of you who know, i used to write and post here...frequently. but after a while i found faith....and not faith as in God or anything but faith as in a girl...named faith.
she opened my eyes to a harsh reality. so i quit everything i thought i was doing wrong in my life for her.  classic love story right?? WRONG. theres no such thing. never was.     like everything else, it fell apart. along with me. now im a mess but i dont want any sympathy. i just want you to enjoy my words... so tell me your oppinion.


im drunk again and it four a.m.

another night wasted
i think its time that i face this....

after three months
and a case a day
i figured out i cant drink you away
the memories of your gorgeous face
are a part of me
that i can never erase

i need you now
because your reason i live
but you made it clear
that i was just some kid

that never had a chance
as you had you fun
theres pressure on the trigger
and im under the gun

i've lost my life
i've lost my faith
so take my breath
and give it away

its not worth it
if i dont have you
but now im drunk
and you have no clue

as to who i am
or what i believe
you said you never cared
you just kept me decieved


but after three months
and a case a day
i figured out i cant drink you away
the memories of your gorgeous face
are a part of me
that i can never erase


~ you cant run from yourself ~
© Copyright 2009 Bryan Lucas - All Rights Reserved
RevengeIsMine
Senior Member
since 07-08-2006
Posts 832
Australia


1 posted 07-09-2009 07:56 PM       View Profile for RevengeIsMine   Email RevengeIsMine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for RevengeIsMine

WOW.. All i can really say is.. i kinda know how u feel atm... but ur work is amazing as always.. you blow me away everytime.. it's great too see u back here..
moonbeam
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 12-24-2005
Posts 2038


2 posted 07-10-2009 04:51 AM       View Profile for moonbeam   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for moonbeam

It's not the best of the poems you've posted, but it may be one of the most heartfelt.  Now you just need to turn the heartfelt into a work of poetic art.

And girls:  avoid them like the plague if you want any peace of mind, become a monk is good.
Bob K
Member Elite
since 11-03-2007
Posts 3860


3 posted 07-10-2009 05:40 PM       View Profile for Bob K   Email Bob K   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Bob K



Dear Clockwork_Orange,

                               This isn't bad.  

     I have a suggestion that might be worth your time.  Why not try re-writing the poem using the Jim Simmerman poetry exercise?  It sometimes helps folks look at their material from a new angle, and gets them unjammed a bit.  It also brings in a bit of playfulness always helpful among such a basically headbanging group as we poets can sometimes be.
http://mypage.siu.edu/puglove/twenty.htm


     Let me know if it's at all helpful.  It's gotten me out of some tight spots in the past.  Good luck.

Bob Kaven
Leanne <3
Member
since 08-25-2007
Posts 217
N.S.W, Australia


4 posted 07-12-2009 10:02 PM       View Profile for Leanne <3   Email Leanne <3   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Leanne <3

so much emotion and honesty
i loved it

hope you're feeling better soon
 
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