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Passions in Poetry

I'm Here

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freeand2sexy
Senior Member
since 09-12-2008
Posts 703
CA, USA


0 posted 05-08-2009 11:57 AM       View Profile for freeand2sexy   Email freeand2sexy   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions   Click to visit freeand2sexy's Home Page   View IP for freeand2sexy

Let your knees
Ease gently to the floor.
Let your arms
Lean against the white wooden door.

Whisper through the key hole.
Breathe out your burdens.
Iím listening.

Let your fingers
Slip under the door.
Let the damage
Spill on the poor pasty floor.

Whisper through the key hole.
Breathe out your burdens.

I'm here,
Kneeling on the other side.

The tips of my fingers
Start to bleed the thoughts
That overwhelm me
© Copyright 2009 Christine Juarez - All Rights Reserved
prettypinkrebel
Member
since 11-07-2007
Posts 104


1 posted 05-08-2009 01:00 PM       View Profile for prettypinkrebel   Email prettypinkrebel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for prettypinkrebel

Hey I like it
moonbeam
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since 12-24-2005
Posts 2038


2 posted 05-08-2009 03:49 PM       View Profile for moonbeam   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for moonbeam

Ha!  Christine, you definitely "get" it.  

This is simply beautiful, and such originality.  Maybe it could work without the parentheses?

Sorry I can't say much more right now, schedule a bit tough at the moment.  More time this weekend I hope.
freeand2sexy
Senior Member
since 09-12-2008
Posts 703
CA, USA


3 posted 05-08-2009 04:14 PM       View Profile for freeand2sexy   Email freeand2sexy   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit freeand2sexy's Home Page   View IP for freeand2sexy

Yeah, I guess it does work without the parentheses, I'll change it then.

The tips of my fingers
Start to bleed the thoughts
That overwhelm me

Falling rain
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Member Elite
since 01-31-2008
Posts 2165
Small town, Illinois


4 posted 05-08-2009 09:16 PM       View Profile for Falling rain   Email Falling rain   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Falling rain's Home Page   View IP for Falling rain

Awww.. I really like this hon.

-Zach

I love my crayons. :D lol

freeand2sexy
Senior Member
since 09-12-2008
Posts 703
CA, USA


5 posted 05-09-2009 12:11 PM       View Profile for freeand2sexy   Email freeand2sexy   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit freeand2sexy's Home Page   View IP for freeand2sexy

Thanks Zach!
Octave
Member
since 07-29-2008
Posts 188
Highlands, Scotland.


6 posted 05-09-2009 12:48 PM       View Profile for Octave   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Octave

I thought this was lovely. It's simplicity and honesty made me smile.
Grinch
Member Elite
since 12-31-2005
Posts 2710
Whoville


7 posted 05-09-2009 12:54 PM       View Profile for Grinch   Email Grinch   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Grinch

Nice poem.

freeand2sexy
Senior Member
since 09-12-2008
Posts 703
CA, USA


8 posted 05-09-2009 07:42 PM       View Profile for freeand2sexy   Email freeand2sexy   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit freeand2sexy's Home Page   View IP for freeand2sexy

Thanks, Octave, I'm glad it made you smile!

The tips of my fingers
Start to bleed the thoughts
That overwhelm me

freeand2sexy
Senior Member
since 09-12-2008
Posts 703
CA, USA


9 posted 05-09-2009 07:43 PM       View Profile for freeand2sexy   Email freeand2sexy   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit freeand2sexy's Home Page   View IP for freeand2sexy

Thank you, Grinch!

The tips of my fingers
Start to bleed the thoughts
That overwhelm me

Kalysta
Junior Member
since 04-02-2009
Posts 41
Ohio


10 posted 05-10-2009 07:02 PM       View Profile for Kalysta   Email Kalysta   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Kalysta

Hey i really liked this. Great write!!!!!!!

~Kalysta~

freeand2sexy
Senior Member
since 09-12-2008
Posts 703
CA, USA


11 posted 05-11-2009 01:29 PM       View Profile for freeand2sexy   Email freeand2sexy   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit freeand2sexy's Home Page   View IP for freeand2sexy

Thanks, Kalysta!

The tips of my fingers
Start to bleed the thoughts
That overwhelm me

Kalysta
Junior Member
since 04-02-2009
Posts 41
Ohio


12 posted 05-18-2009 09:39 PM       View Profile for Kalysta   Email Kalysta   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Kalysta

No problem Christine. LOL I really enjoyed reading it. Keep ip the amazing poetry or I'm going to get you. LOL JK.

~Kalysta~

freeand2sexy
Senior Member
since 09-12-2008
Posts 703
CA, USA


13 posted 05-18-2009 09:44 PM       View Profile for freeand2sexy   Email freeand2sexy   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit freeand2sexy's Home Page   View IP for freeand2sexy

Lol, I'll try to.

The tips of my fingers
Start to bleed the thoughts
That overwhelm me

Kalysta
Junior Member
since 04-02-2009
Posts 41
Ohio


14 posted 05-19-2009 09:37 PM       View Profile for Kalysta   Email Kalysta   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Kalysta

Thats all we can ask.
~Kalysta~

~Kalysta~

nehematala
Member
since 05-21-2009
Posts 129


15 posted 05-29-2009 06:09 PM       View Profile for nehematala   Email nehematala   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for nehematala

I love this poem it really reminds me of a few years back but i don't want to get into that but i really understand what you mean

If you don't like something,
Change it...
If you can't change it,
Change the way you think about it

freeand2sexy
Senior Member
since 09-12-2008
Posts 703
CA, USA


16 posted 05-29-2009 07:59 PM       View Profile for freeand2sexy   Email freeand2sexy   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit freeand2sexy's Home Page   View IP for freeand2sexy

Thanks!!

The tips of my fingers
Start to bleed the thoughts
That overwhelm me

sweet_darling
New Member
since 06-11-2009
Posts 2
canada


17 posted 06-11-2009 10:45 PM       View Profile for sweet_darling   Email sweet_darling   Edit/Delete Message     View IP for sweet_darling

I love the way you wrote this poem. it makes me want to talk to you too!
*chels
freeand2sexy
Senior Member
since 09-12-2008
Posts 703
CA, USA


18 posted 06-18-2009 07:02 PM       View Profile for freeand2sexy   Email freeand2sexy   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit freeand2sexy's Home Page   View IP for freeand2sexy

Thank you!

The hardest part about writing poetry,
is trying not to write like everyone else.

kindredspirit
Member
since 05-19-2009
Posts 156


19 posted 06-20-2009 10:44 AM       View Profile for kindredspirit   Email kindredspirit   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for kindredspirit

a beautiful and compelling write!
freeand2sexy
Senior Member
since 09-12-2008
Posts 703
CA, USA


20 posted 06-23-2009 02:04 PM       View Profile for freeand2sexy   Email freeand2sexy   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit freeand2sexy's Home Page   View IP for freeand2sexy

Thanks!

The hardest part about writing poetry,
is trying not to write like everyone else.

moonbeam
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Member Elite
since 12-24-2005
Posts 2038


21 posted 06-23-2009 05:56 PM       View Profile for moonbeam   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for moonbeam

I don't mind how many people bring this to the top - it's still one of the best poems I've ever seen at PiP.

You should have a go at this when you have time:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/books/series/poetryworkshop
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