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 cracked chest
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Passions in Poetry

cracked chest

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nina1522
Member
since 02-14-2009
Posts 189


0 posted 04-21-2009 11:04 PM       View Profile for nina1522   Email nina1522   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for nina1522

           strangers

tell me to close the lid
    to lock my emotions
       to hide the key
          to bury them
        beneath deluded soil
     beneath the mud
  beneath unstable ground
beneath the eyes of others


full of foriegn thoughts
the box sits and waits
waiting for blithe feelings
waiting for the acceptance
   cold
      chipped
          cracked
             bleeding

        the box waits

:] turtle
© Copyright 2009 nina1522 - All Rights Reserved
moonbeam
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since 12-24-2005
Posts 2038


1 posted 04-22-2009 05:47 AM       View Profile for moonbeam   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for moonbeam

This is the best poem I've seen from you nina, possibly the best by far.  Whatever you're doing, keep doing it.
Rosie_Orange
Junior Member
since 04-20-2009
Posts 46
South Africa


2 posted 04-22-2009 10:31 AM       View Profile for Rosie_Orange   Email Rosie_Orange   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Rosie_Orange

I love it! its almost like a metaphor... burying your emotions...
brilliant (:
JenniferMaxwell
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since 09-14-2006
Posts 2275


3 posted 04-22-2009 11:04 AM       View Profile for JenniferMaxwell   Email JenniferMaxwell   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for JenniferMaxwell

Really nice work on this one, Nina!
turtle
Member
since 01-23-2009
Posts 491
Harbor


4 posted 04-22-2009 02:13 PM       View Profile for turtle   Email turtle   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for turtle

Nina,

I just have to say that even I am impressed with this poem.

The metaphorical implications of "box" verges on profound.

This coming from a 15 year old girl that hasn't even written a dozen poems almost boggles the mind.
nina1522
Member
since 02-14-2009
Posts 189


5 posted 04-22-2009 06:40 PM       View Profile for nina1522   Email nina1522   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for nina1522

haha no way!! this was my easiest poem. it didnt take me long i just wrote it. haha thanks everyone. wow moonbeam thank you. i really repsect that you think its the best one, you ussually critique poems and i was stunned to see you thought mine was good. thank you
 
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