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 These memories
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Passions in Poetry

These memories(freewrite #2)

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freeand2sexy
Senior Member
since 09-12-2008
Posts 703
CA, USA


0 posted 03-14-2009 08:50 PM       View Profile for freeand2sexy   Email freeand2sexy   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions   Click to visit freeand2sexy's Home Page   View IP for freeand2sexy


Topic:If only I could erace the memory
It took me five minutes


These memories all around me
They just won't go away
If only I could erase them
And forget from where they came

If only they weren't real
Would life ease up on me
Would my wounds forever heal
From all insanity

Would smiles fill my world again
And fight off all this pain
Would laughs suffocate life
And make me feel more sane

These memories I hold on to
Now fill me with so much regret
If only I could erase them
But do I really want to forget




No, I'm not conceited, 2sexy doesn't mean "too sexy", it means something else!

[This message has been edited by freeand2sexy (03-15-2009 10:39 PM).]

© Copyright 2009 Christine Juarez - All Rights Reserved
isabella223
Junior Member
since 03-14-2009
Posts 15


1 posted 03-15-2009 07:13 PM       View Profile for isabella223   Email isabella223   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for isabella223

wow i loved the last stanza. i like how you first use insanity in the last line of a stanza and then use sane in the following one in the last line... does that make sense?

[This message has been edited by isabella223 (03-15-2009 09:31 PM).]

freeand2sexy
Senior Member
since 09-12-2008
Posts 703
CA, USA


2 posted 03-15-2009 10:41 PM       View Profile for freeand2sexy   Email freeand2sexy   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit freeand2sexy's Home Page   View IP for freeand2sexy

If you look closely you'll see that it does.

But I did realize that it's kind of redundant.

"Would my wounds forever heal / from all insanity"

"Would laughs suffocate life / and make me feel more sane"

Wouldn’t you agree that it kind of sounds the same, just worded differently? So it does make sense but it’s redundant.

No, I'm not conceited, 2sexy doesn't mean "too sexy", it means something else!

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