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Passions in Poetry

Freeing Passion (Please Read!!)

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GothicCherry
Member
since 09-16-2008
Posts 471
TN


0 posted 02-15-2009 01:57 PM       View Profile for GothicCherry   Email GothicCherry   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for GothicCherry


I was alone like a warm day in the artic.
Passion pulsed passively through my veins.
It gave me a paining such as arsenic.
For pain was the outlet that so far reigned.

A chilling break came from releasing
the spirit so restricted inside my skin
through recording thoughts and feelings
in discussion, with paper, from my pen.

Oh, the rain did crash from eyes so strained!
A hermit filled with desire that must be revealed.
Passive passion still pulsed, now tearstained,
waiting for someone to steal the desire I concealed.

Along came a hot season in the iced land,
unveiling the secret wishes of many suitors.
Still, none with equal passion offered their hand.
The tears fell harder with feather-like ruptures.

Running backwards into my cold forbidden premieres.
I needed one place where the passion could emanate
from my veins into the world so frozen in fears.
Then, I heard your voice. A distant delicate vibrate.

My sprint reversed its direction trying to reach you.
Circles turned to triangles through weeks of stress.
Hoping to find a love that was true.Yet, I had no clue
to how easily you could see my suppressed distress.

I kept pressing on in my quest for your heart.
My passion leaked out and you finally agreed.
In this world soul-mates exist from the start.
Iím yours. Youíre mine. Together weíre freed.

© Copyright 2009 Michaela J. McHone - All Rights Reserved
Falling rain
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 01-31-2008
Posts 2165
Small town, Illinois


1 posted 02-15-2009 04:29 PM       View Profile for Falling rain   Email Falling rain   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Falling rain's Home Page   View IP for Falling rain

Oh. My. God!!! This is like the longest poem I've read from you but its one of the best!! Library for sure!!

-Zach

When I see your smile, and I know itís not for me, thatís when Iíll miss you.

GothicCherry
Member
since 09-16-2008
Posts 471
TN


2 posted 02-15-2009 04:42 PM       View Profile for GothicCherry   Email GothicCherry   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for GothicCherry

Thanks Zach! I needed something to express how I've felt for so long in this world and it turned out being very long. I couldn't say it without making it long. I'm glad you enjoyed it. Thanks for taking the time to read it.

Much Love,
     Michaela
freeand2sexy
Senior Member
since 09-12-2008
Posts 703
CA, USA


3 posted 02-15-2009 06:23 PM       View Profile for freeand2sexy   Email freeand2sexy   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit freeand2sexy's Home Page   View IP for freeand2sexy

Wow, this is really good, you should learn to write using some kind of meter in your poems, your poetry would become absolutely amazing if you did.

I totally loved this, tho.

With God I am happy; sadness has no say in my life.

GothicCherry
Member
since 09-16-2008
Posts 471
TN


4 posted 02-15-2009 06:48 PM       View Profile for GothicCherry   Email GothicCherry   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for GothicCherry

Ummmm, I really have no idea what meter is actually. Think you can help? Lol...
Clockwork_Orange
Senior Member
since 03-23-2007
Posts 623
Space Camp, IN


5 posted 02-15-2009 07:20 PM       View Profile for Clockwork_Orange   Email Clockwork_Orange   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Clockwork_Orange's Home Page   View IP for Clockwork_Orange

My sprint reversed its direction trying to reach you.
Circles turned to triangles through weeks of stress.
Hoping to find a love that was true.Yet, I had no clue
to how easily you could see my suppressed distress.

wow really my favorite part. i loved this entire piece though. i must have read it twelve times.
GothicCherry
Member
since 09-16-2008
Posts 471
TN


6 posted 02-15-2009 07:23 PM       View Profile for GothicCherry   Email GothicCherry   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for GothicCherry

Wow!!! Twelve?? Dang...Lol I'm glad you enjoyed it so much
freeand2sexy
Senior Member
since 09-12-2008
Posts 703
CA, USA


7 posted 02-15-2009 07:40 PM       View Profile for freeand2sexy   Email freeand2sexy   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit freeand2sexy's Home Page   View IP for freeand2sexy

I can only help a lil, since i'm still learning myself.

With God I am happy; sadness has no say in my life.

GothicCherry
Member
since 09-16-2008
Posts 471
TN


8 posted 02-15-2009 08:01 PM       View Profile for GothicCherry   Email GothicCherry   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for GothicCherry

Oh ok lol
RevengeIsMine
Senior Member
since 07-08-2006
Posts 832
Australia


9 posted 02-17-2009 05:56 PM       View Profile for RevengeIsMine   Email RevengeIsMine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for RevengeIsMine

WOW, so your the new miss popular in and around this place. Your rhyming, to me, was off, felt forced in places. Considering nobody else has metioned that it's probably just me and the flow was a bit dodgey as well.  

Keep Writing
nina1522
Member
since 02-14-2009
Posts 189


10 posted 02-17-2009 07:59 PM       View Profile for nina1522   Email nina1522   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for nina1522

i think some of the vocabulary was forced and i  believe that the flow could have been a little bit better. but it was good. good job gothcherry
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