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 Teen Poetry #9
 Roaring out
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Passions in Poetry

Roaring out

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gdcod2player
Member
since 07-26-2008
Posts 116


0 posted 02-09-2009 05:40 PM       View Profile for gdcod2player   Email gdcod2player   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for gdcod2player

Today Iíve learned more about you
What color your eyes turn in the sunís first rays
The songs you love to play
The words that felt so real
Echoing with a meaning
They gave me a drive to find you
The reason I seem to be lost now
The reason I canít find you
Itís not my fault no one knows I exist
Iím just an imaginary wall with to many excuses
Is it possible for any help?
Or is this the last chance to find you?
So many reasons I canít give because they seem to be meaningless
You seem to really love old Jim K.
The heart ache it gives me wonít go away

My blood keeps roaring out my veins
The cold of the night has filled me
Without the moon I have no light
The guide I needed was never lit
The torch you gave me hasnít went out
Iíll find you even if it takes an eternity
© Copyright 2009 gdcod2player - All Rights Reserved
Assassin_of_Verse
Member
since 10-23-2007
Posts 330
that So Cal


1 posted 02-12-2009 02:28 AM       View Profile for Assassin_of_Verse   Email Assassin_of_Verse   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Assassin_of_Verse

I think that you started out very well. I especially liked these lines:
"Today I've learned more about you
What color your eyes turn in the sun's first rays
The songs you love to play
The words that felt so real
Echoing with a meaning"

But you kinda lost me at:
"It's not my fault no one knows I exist"
It's probly just me, but it just didn't seem to flow right...

Anyway, thanks for sharing!

There is power in the pen.

 
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