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 Break-Up Is Such A Tragic Thing.
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Passions in Poetry

Break-Up Is Such A Tragic Thing.

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Falling rain
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since 01-31-2008
Posts 2165
Small town, Illinois


0 posted 01-22-2009 07:37 PM       View Profile for Falling rain   Email Falling rain   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions   Click to visit Falling rain's Home Page   View IP for Falling rain

I dedicate this poem to Keagan. Since he was placed in this very same position. Hope your healing buddy.

_________________________________________

Break-Up Is Such A Tragic Thing.
Driving slow on the road
Radio's hanging my ear.
No spoken words
Tension building; what I fear.

The world stopped spin'n
Heart can't stop beating its tune.
Feel that there's not much hope
It needs to end soon.

I can't take it anymore
Our love wasn't that strong
Thought I had it in me
But I simply can't hold on.

Had my fill of this
I'm running out of lies.
Can't pretend any longer
Eventually my heart will die

Seven days of the came ol' act.
Seven days of heartache for me.
Held captive in this
Wishing to be set free

Losing sleep every night
Its eating away at my heart
I need to spit it out
Before I'm torn apart.

You say we can make it through
But I don't wanna try
Only thing left to say
is good bye.

I can't carry on
like nothing's wrong.
Can't be apart of this
tragic song.

I hate being in this
Can't seem to take much more.
Break up is just too sad for me
There's not much to look for.


© Copyright 2009 Zach Booker-Scott - All Rights Reserved
Falling rain
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1 posted 01-23-2009 05:28 PM       View Profile for Falling rain   Email Falling rain   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Falling rain's Home Page   View IP for Falling rain

Yeah this poem sorta sucks.. its too long. yeah i know. *sigh* oh well.. Mistakes are made to be improved!

-Zach

When I see your smile, and I know itís not for me, thatís when Iíll miss you.

freeand2sexy
Senior Member
since 09-12-2008
Posts 703
CA, USA


2 posted 01-23-2009 11:09 PM       View Profile for freeand2sexy   Email freeand2sexy   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit freeand2sexy's Home Page   View IP for freeand2sexy

It wasn't that bad, but i have seen you do better. um, maybe i'm a lil slow today but what does the second line mean?

With God I am happy; sadness has no say in my life.

Octave
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since 07-29-2008
Posts 188
Highlands, Scotland.


3 posted 01-24-2009 11:48 AM       View Profile for Octave   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Octave

I don't think it was too bad. I've seen you do better, but as you said, mistakes are made to improve on. There were some nice parts in this. Good try anyway. Take this poem as a lesson. (:
Falling rain
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4 posted 01-24-2009 08:56 PM       View Profile for Falling rain   Email Falling rain   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Falling rain's Home Page   View IP for Falling rain

Thanks for the comments guys. Yes Octave there is always room for improvement. And Freeand2sexy do you mean second line or stanza? Cause the second line is sorta obvious "Radio hanging in my ear" It means the radio is playing. But if you meant second stanza...

"The world stopped spin'n"
It seems that time has just slowed down.

"Heart can't stop beating its tune"
Well my heart stopped beating..

"Feel that there's not much hope
It needs to end soon. "
I don't seem any hope staying in this relationship so I have to end it soon..

Sorry if I speak in riddles sometimes. lol.    

-Zach

When I see your smile, and I know itís not for me, thatís when Iíll miss you.

GothicCherry
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since 09-16-2008
Posts 471
TN


5 posted 01-27-2009 11:06 PM       View Profile for GothicCherry   Email GothicCherry   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for GothicCherry

Isn't most poetry in riddles?? Lol...
 
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