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Passions in Poetry

Slipping Through My Fingers...

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RevengeIsMine
Senior Member
since 07-08-2006
Posts 832
Australia


0 posted 01-10-2009 04:59 AM       View Profile for RevengeIsMine   Email RevengeIsMine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for RevengeIsMine


Hey Guys, sorry to all about the non-replies on poems been so busy with the baby... time is just going on soo quickly and by the time i do get around to me time i'm just that pooped i sleep lol. Well here's something new from me... Guess it's upto you on how u interperate it.

Slipping Through My Fingers..


Something isn't right
I can feel it in the air
This darkness is forsaken
And i'll be dammed if you care


Another broken promise
That you shot through my heart
It was never ment to hurt like this
Wish you'd warned me from the start


I screamed your name the other night
You were no where to be found
I lost myself in tears again
But dared not make a sound


Another night like this
And i'm not sure i'll make it through
I never signed up for the heart break
That came from loving you


It's been six days and four hours
Since i heard your voice
You signed up for this stupid job
Because we didn't have a choice


Tonight i'll lay awake and cry
I'd do anything to have you here
Your slipping through my fingers
And i'm drowning here in fear


* Um too clarify stuff.. Things are tough now the baby's here... and Andrew's taken a job.. working on a fishing boat close to the antartic borders. He's been gone for about a week.. and i haven't heard from him since he left (He promised he'd call).. it's not a full time job just two trips because we need the money... and i'm worried that something's going to happen too him... *
© Copyright 2009 A Typical Aussie Chick - All Rights Reserved
Falling rain
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 01-31-2008
Posts 2165
Small town, Illinois


1 posted 01-10-2009 08:51 AM       View Profile for Falling rain   Email Falling rain   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Falling rain's Home Page   View IP for Falling rain

Great poem like always Jess. Don't worry about Andrew, I prayed for him so I think God and his angels will take care of him. Keep your hopes up.

-Zach

When I see your smile, and I know itís not for me, thatís when Iíll miss you.

XxForever.BrokenxX
Senior Member
since 01-20-2008
Posts 887
Neverland


2 posted 01-10-2009 08:06 PM       View Profile for XxForever.BrokenxX   Email XxForever.BrokenxX   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for XxForever.BrokenxX

Don't worry Jess, everything will turn out fine. I know it's hurting you, but i know Andrew loves you.
hugs 'n kisses,
               Em

{~~*~~}

Miss.Emmalee

"Who the **** are you?!!?.. GET AWAY FROM MY LIMO!!"

RenaissanceRomanceRunsRed
Senior Member
since 06-11-2007
Posts 1062
In Love <3


3 posted 01-15-2009 09:28 AM       View Profile for RenaissanceRomanceRunsRed   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for RenaissanceRomanceRunsRed

I would say don't worry, but being a girl with a daring boyfriend myself, I understand that those words hardly mean a thing. So what I will tell you is that #1- Beautiful poem, loved the wording, felt the emotion. #2- Faith is a wonderful thing. #3- When he gets back you better kick his butt for not calling. lol. Best wishes Jess. I'm sure that he'll be safe.

-Kate

"Lucy: I think you are the most selfish person on the planet. George: Well that's just silly. Have you met everyone on the planet?"

Rocheal
Junior Member
since 03-15-2009
Posts 25


4 posted 03-15-2009 10:32 PM       View Profile for Rocheal   Email Rocheal   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Rocheal

What an awesome poem-- you write so well.
GothicCherry
Member
since 09-16-2008
Posts 471
TN


5 posted 03-16-2009 08:46 AM       View Profile for GothicCherry   Email GothicCherry   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for GothicCherry

This poem was very good. I would be so angry at him for not calling, but yeah I'm sure you will worry no matter what.

In the last line of the first stanza maybe taking the word 'and' out would help the flow a little. It just caught my attention.

Nice work.
 
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