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Open Poetry #43
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When I was young...
| Open Poetry #43 |
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When I was young... |
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Roniece Dawson-Bruce Member Ascendant
since 2000-01-29
Posts 5689Sydney, Australia 
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When I was young I believed in the milky way and all things beautiful When I was young I thought that if you sat upstairs in the cinema you saw a different movie When I was young I learned to dance in a country hall and I thought that was pretty cool When I was young my parents kissed each other goodbye and hello and I thought that was normal When I was young my siblings didn’t always want to play with me but I knew they liked me as a sister When I was young our neighbours were our best friends and that felt completely ok When I was young I loved a boy with all my heart but then he died and to me nothing else mattered.. [This message has been edited by Roniece Dawson-Bruce (11-25-2008 06:15 AM).] |
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| © Copyright 2008 Roniece Dawson-Bruce - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
A very sad ending to such an winsome poem... |
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Robert E. Jordan Member Rara Avis
since 2008-01-25
Posts 8541Philadelphia, Pennsylvania |
Yo Dear RDB, This poem is very well done. It has a good build-up and a dramatic ending. Love Bobby |
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OwlSA Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347Durban, South Africa |
A beautiful poem with a very sad ending, Roniece. Hugs all the way to back then - Owl |
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Rick Member Elite
since 2001-06-21
Posts 2903Victoria, Australia |
Dear Roniece, to be young again and have the innocents of youth, what a gift that would be, to see life as beautiful and new, to experience it all again, that is except the parts that still hurt inside. I loved this write Roniece, let's be kids again today and enjoy some of this life hey. Take care. Rick |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
geez, when I was young the Dead Sea was only sick!  |
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steavenr Member Elite
since 2003-11-17
Posts 4058 |
such a cleverly written work with such an unexpected ending...you move the reader with amazing alacrity...another beautiful (and that word is so lightly and overly used) write |
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jwesley Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563Spring, Texas |
Funny how 'when I was young' means so much more when you're not quite there anymore... much enjoyed... j. |
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
quote: And cool it is, dear Roniece! Dance on! I just read something attributed to Augustinus. He said: It is imperative that you learn to dance, otherwise the Angels won't know what to do with you! quote: You were lucky. In our family no kisses (teutonic glacial education), until a young acquired uncle introduced us to this lovely practice ... guess! He had French charm and manners. I remember my Grandmother thinking it wasn't proper, but after a while she too was conquered. quote: More than ok I would say, the basics of local, national and international peace ... no less! quote: And that was a deeply traumatic event, a sadness that can't be erased. But you have been able to love again and we are all so grateful for your generous heart that you continuously share with us. This was beautiful and very inspiring, dear Roniece. Thank you. Love, Margherita  "Love is the One who masters all things; |
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Huan Yi Member Ascendant
since 2004-10-12
Posts 6688Waukegan |
. Good John . |
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Oklahoma Rose Senior Member
since 2008-02-28
Posts 1586Oklahoma USA |
Oh how sad, Roniece. |
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Roniece Dawson-Bruce Member Ascendant
since 2000-01-29
Posts 5689Sydney, Australia |
thank you everyone... I appreciate your beautiful comments always.. Dear Margherita...thank you for commenting on my verses..you are so beautiful and I really do appreciate your generous comments.. you are generous in your time to everyone here.. thank you again.. love and hugs RDB Be kind at heart....for everyone you meet has their own battle to fight......... |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
"and to me nothing else mattered.." yes...or at least never the same. "too bad ignorance isn't painful" |
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2islander2 Member Ascendant
since 2008-03-12
Posts 6825by the sea |
Hi Roniece, this is upsetting, the end wet my eyes with two tears, I will say no more. yann |
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Bill Charles Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619highways, & byways, for now |
Roniece Dawson-Bruce - I believed also, as you, but then until... BC |
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vandana
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463USA |
nice read  |
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LindsayP Member Elite
since 2007-07-28
Posts 3410Australia, Victoria |
Oh Roniece that is such a heart touching Poem my dear, a delight to read. Love. Lindsay |
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Lady Ayla Member
since 2008-07-19
Posts 84WV, United States |
Wow. I wasn't expecting that ending. |
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poddarku Senior Member
since 2008-01-15
Posts 589india |
When I was young I thought that if you sat upstairs in the cinema you saw a different movie >>> Wonderfully captured. Soft and tender this poem certainly touches a chord |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
-------------------------------------- "When I was young I believed in the milky way and all things beautiful" --------------------------------------- I still do but now I find myself trying to connect the dots and just when I think I have come up with a new constellation, a star falls and I have to start over. ----------------------------------------- "When I was young my parents kissed each other goodbye and hello and I thought that was normal" ----------------------------------------- This one really made me miss the good ole days. I love the way you were able to take what used to be "simple" things and give them so much impact in your words. Lot's emotions and memories came to me with each of your lines. The ending hit hard but it did add to the reality of life and it was worded perfectly. Very much enjoyed reading this one. |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
A precious flow of words...as I always say, no one likes to lose someone they care for...James |
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