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Open Poetry #43
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1slick_lady
Member Ascendant
since 2000-12-22
Posts 6088
standing on a shadow's lace

0 posted 2008-11-15 04:32 PM


Dominion


what is it I have done to you
to deserve this deep ache
I thought you were a friend
that was my first mistake
you had your own agenda
plan I did not understand
and all that was engineered
was written in the sand
I’m not some little girl
and you sure are not school
needing someone to sit in your corner
you’ll have to find a different fool
you’re just a one horse rodeo
underneath an empty tent
hot aired cloudy rhinestones
from days lived misspent
opaque beauty falls to ugly
so common and quite plain
a lonely canvas kingdom  
spreading misery you reign



© Copyright 2008 Helen Chambers - All Rights Reserved
Mark Bohannan
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269
In the winds of Cherokee song
1 posted 2008-11-15 04:57 PM


Vivid expressions of a torment that no one should have to face.  It seems to be more and more common these days.  Well expressed and enjoyed the read.  
Bill Charles
Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619
highways, & byways, for now
2 posted 2008-11-15 05:34 PM


1slick_lady - I agree with Mark, wish you well.

BC

Marchmadness
Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271
So. El Monte, California
3 posted 2008-11-15 06:41 PM


Wow, powerful write, Helen.
                      Ida

Pilgrimage
Member Elite
since 2001-12-04
Posts 3945
Texas, USA
4 posted 2008-11-15 11:10 PM


Been there, done that, bought the t-shirt.  I like the way you express yourself in this one.  

Nan (Pilgrim variety)

Juju
Member Elite
since 2003-12-29
Posts 3429
In your dreams
5 posted 2008-11-15 11:11 PM


Ouch I know this guilty feeling
):

-Juju

-"So you found a girl
Who thinks really deep thougts
What's so amazing about really deep thoughts " Silent all these Years, Tori Amos

steavenr
Member Elite
since 2003-11-17
Posts 4058

6 posted 2008-11-16 12:48 PM


I think I just want to say 'ouch' after reading this one...there's such a clear portrait of deep-felt pain in this one...so very well expressed
nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
7 posted 2008-11-16 08:44 AM


"opaque beauty falls to ugly
so common and quite plain
a lonely canvas kingdom  
spreading misery you reign"

so very true, Helen...

well said

M

Pantheress
Member
since 2008-11-02
Posts 215
Queensland, Australia
8 posted 2008-11-16 08:17 PM


This is sad and beauitful, Thank you
Oklahoma Rose
Senior Member
since 2008-02-28
Posts 1586
Oklahoma USA
9 posted 2008-11-16 10:35 PM


I always knew you were a strong one.
suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
10 posted 2008-11-19 04:06 PM


The pain of betrayal hurts to our very core, making mockery of memories we treasured and leaving bitterness in their place.

Brilliant!

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