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jbal892
Member

since 2007-11-25

Posts 58

0 posted 2008-07-21 06:33 PM

Remember a Time

I once wrote a poem
Of a Memory Lane.
Heartaches and tears
It did contain.

But now this lane
I'm walkin down;
It contains joy
In leaps and bounds.

Rummaging through
My old desk drawer,
Pictures of you
Were found once more

It's been so long
Since they last were seen
With these fresh new images
I will paint a scene

Do you remember the day
That we first met?
There was certainly something
That I did covet

At first I knew not
Just what to do
That coveted something
Definitely was you

Do you remember the day
Of our first kiss?
That old memory
I certainly missed

I walked you to our corner,
And told you good bye
I pulled you close to me
And looked you in the eye.

Do you remember the day
I first said I love you?
Had to hide it from our parents
Afraid of what they could do.

It's been three years now
Since I first professed my love
Wait an eternity longer
And this love still grows stronger

Do you remember the day
I said I still love you too?
It wasn't that long ago
I know I certainly do

So you see, this Memory Lane
It took a turn
180 Degrees
Straight towards the sky

While you are gone,
Not a day goes by
I'll sit there and pray
Straight towards the sky

But for now I must
Lay down and rest
Let my dreams do the talking
For they always know best

Robert E. Jordan
Member Rara Avis

since 2008-01-25

Posts 8541
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

1 posted 2008-07-21 10:08 PM

Yo jbal892,

I'd drop the caps starting each line, and work on the punctuation.

Bobby

jbal892
Member

since 2007-11-25

Posts 58

2 posted 2008-07-21 10:58 PM

Yea, I realized that after I posted it and haven't had a chance to edit it. Usually I type these poems up in MSWord with punctuation and everything first then just copy/paste it over, but I'm giving this poem to someone and I forgot to type in the punctuation that I have written in on the paper.

kaile

Member Ascendant

since 2000-02-06

Posts 5146
singapore

3 posted 2008-07-23 09:16 AM

it seemed like a sad piece. i hope all is better now

Moonkist
Member

since 2006-09-29

Posts 197
Pennsylvania

4 posted 2008-07-23 09:29 AM

This was beautiful and sad... thanks for the walk down this memory lane.

jbal892
Member

since 2007-11-25

Posts 58

5 posted 2008-07-23 01:49 PM

Thanks guys. Things are definitely better now. The reason I wrote this is it was memories of a relationship I was in a few years ago, but we're getting back together sometime soon. I was laying in bed just thinkin and was inspired to write something of all the memories I had of when we dated last. Hopefully we'll make plenty of new ones =)

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean

since 2002-08-27

Posts 40215
Realms of Light

6 posted 2008-07-23 06:06 PM

A broad smile came upon my face when I read your explanation for this touching poem.

Love is not often given a second chance but when it does, "love is better the second time around". May this be the case for both of you!

EA

jbal892
Member

since 2007-11-25

Posts 58

7 posted 2008-07-23 07:13 PM

Yep, we both realized some things when we apart apart for the last year (it was actually a year last month, but who's counting right?). I definitely think I've been given a second chance by someone up above.

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