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Open Poetry #43
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Moon Globe Stars
| Open Poetry #43 |
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Moon Globe Stars |
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threadbear Senior Member
since 2008-07-10
Posts 817Indy 
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Moon Globe Stars A world of hugs and smiles kisses and and and he couldn’t hug. He gifted her instead with porcelain ponies and lace flowers They stood proud on her dresser for a day or so then queued up with all the others on two shelves of forgotten treasures. and he knew why and it saddened him. He dog paddled when he should have swam she wanted for happiness All he knew was what he has always done and gave her a moon globe. The moon floated somehow by itself suspended within a solution of stars He told her the stars are all the kisses he wanted to give her but hadn’t he was never trained for this The moon was a beautiful princess surrounded by all the love in the universe Her smile was moon glow in answer She shook up the Moon Globe and showered him with kisses instead. |
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| © Copyright 2008 Jeff Feezle - All Rights Reserved | |||
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XGarapanX Senior Member
since 2008-06-19
Posts 1435Antarctica |
Heavy sigh... ·´~`·»Garapan«·´~`· |
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Marchmadness Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271So. El Monte, California |
There's romantic poetry and good romantic poetry. This is good! Ida |
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BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
Enjoyed the complexity and simple beauty all wrapped up in one. I really like the way you write, tb~ |
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Robert E. Jordan Member Rara Avis
since 2008-01-25
Posts 8541Philadelphia, Pennsylvania |
Yo Threadbear, The idea is there. I’d study the punctuation a little bit, to keep it from all running together. Bobby |
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Joyce Johnson
since 2001-03-10
Posts 9912Washington State |
Very pensive. Joyce |
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
Very lovely! Love, Margherita |
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OwlSA Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347Durban, South Africa |
Much enjoyed your sadly beautiful poem. - Owl |
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threadbear Senior Member
since 2008-07-10
Posts 817Indy |
To all: your most kind and helpful comments are mega-appreciated. Sad to think there are fathers out there who have never learned the value of a hug. tb |
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Alison
since 2008-01-27
Posts 9318Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy! |
Such a lovely poem. I love how he showed her what he was not capable of giving - and then it was like they became true partners. She showers him with kisses, loving him in spite of his inadequacies in speaking of his love. Anyway, I am rambling, but I love this. Alison |
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Gaelynsgirl Member
since 2008-07-18
Posts 175Ont. Canada |
I was touched by this poignant poem and your recognition of that communication that some simply find awkward. I have often felt that our education would be so greatly enriched if a course in relationships was compulsory. How many lives would be changed. Perhaps someone reading your poem will take a chance and reach out. I hope so. Very thoughtful and insightful! Lynda |
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