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nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines

0 posted 2008-05-11 06:40 AM



Feelingless


It's hard to express these feelings
that hide in the deep now
when everyone answers in kind,
"We all have our troubles"
and I think to myself once again,
just keep silent.

It's a sad world when the shoulders
are no longer there and everyone becomes
so self-absorbed that empathy
no longer exists and prayers
are kept tight-lipped.

I have seen it all in the last few years:
life, death, cancer,
some things not able to be controlled.
Alcoholism, emergency rooms, loss of lifestyle
and supposed friends.

I am becoming feelingless,
wishing to live in the dark,
those old phobias poking holes
in what was a once promising future.
Like the song says, "I wish I could dance
with my father again."

M

"Love is not blind - It sees more and not less, but because it sees more, it is willing to see less."
(Will Moss)

© Copyright 2008 Wynter Bliss - All Rights Reserved
Oklahoma Rose
Senior Member
since 2008-02-28
Posts 1586
Oklahoma USA
1 posted 2008-05-11 06:48 AM


Awwww Maureen, believe it ot not, I know how you feel. I feel that same way, myself.
passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
2 posted 2008-05-11 07:53 AM


Maureen, my shoulders will always be here and my prayers always flowing freely



Margherita
Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236
Eternity
3 posted 2008-05-11 10:17 AM


Dear Maureen, like always you express your feelings so very intensely.
And I do hope you will see the end of this dark tunnel. It is the sense of separation from our divine Source that makes you see the world, your world, so full of darkness.
I would like you to feel that there is an infinite well of love within you, where all healing starts.
May you tap into it and smile again. You are never ever alone.
Love and hugs.
Margherita

BluesSerenade
Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549
By the Seaside
4 posted 2008-05-11 12:33 PM


Just hugs, because I have so been there.  It's not easy dodging all the curve balls that life throws at us. However there is a sense of well being and pride in our own strength when we come out on the other side in one piece.

I know you've got what it takes to see you through, Maureen.


secondhanddreampoet
Member Ascendant
since 2006-11-07
Posts 6394
a 'Universalist' !
5 posted 2008-05-11 03:00 PM


a very 'real' and powerfully expressive and emotive 'write!'

It would be marvelous...if we could 'go home again' or find that magic frozen 'river to just skate away on'...

and, this 'Runaway American Dream' has indeed devolved into an ever-darkling society of the magnificently self-referential...

Even if it is of only very small comfort in the knowing...I suspect there are ever-increasing numbers of us 'out here' in this American wasteland who feel (and have experienced) similarly!...we relate to your most unjust circumstances and 'understand' all-too-clearly...

applause for this 'penning!'

Richy
Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 3050

6 posted 2008-05-11 03:25 PM



"It's hard to express these feelings
that hide in the deep now
when everyone answers in kind,
"We all have our troubles"
and I think to myself once again,
just keep silent.

It's a sad world when the shoulders
are no longer there and everyone becomes
so self-absorbed that empathy
no longer exists and prayers
are kept tight-lipped."

Yes, all one really needs during these times, are a bent ear, a firm shoulder, and two open arms. Keep the words. In talking, as with most things, less is more. All we really need, is someone, who will really, listen.

So nice to read you again Maureen.
Hoping things, get much better.

Rich


shyvl
Senior Member
since 2008-04-11
Posts 531
texas, usa
7 posted 2008-05-11 11:52 PM


Maureen- Hugs for your pain. Too many of us are afraid to open up and spend our lives as strangers to the world.  There are still shoulders even if over the www.  Pleasure to read your thoughts
sharyn

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
8 posted 2008-05-12 06:27 AM


Oklahoma Rose, sometimes life gets in the way~~ thank you and I hope all is well with you.
  
Dixie, funny thing about prayers and shoulders...sometimes when one is strong the other is weak. Thanks  

Margherita, the end of the tunnel is way off in the distance. "Separation from our divine Source" is not what makes me feel or see the world so full of darkness. Truth does... and uncontrollable events. Thank you for the kind thoughts.

BluesSerenade, I am still dodging and weaving and should have thrown in the towel years ago. Strength shows on the outside  because there is no choice.
But inside, I am like the wicked witch of oz...and am melting, the best part of me dissolving into nothingness.



Bruce, there is no magic in "today"
and sometimes the struggle, as you and I both know, is not worth it. Thanks for understanding.



Richy, my life is like a soap opera and even I don't like to think about it  
"...someone, who will really listen."
Yes. Thank you, Rich.

sharyn, it's never about opening up. It's knowing there is someone who cares enough to confide in and not judge...and maybe even give some helpful suggestions to make it through a tough time. Thank you

I appreciate all of your thoughts.
M


  




Marilyn
Member Elite
since 1999-09-26
Posts 2621
Ontario, Canada
9 posted 2008-05-12 10:08 AM


Hey girl. Remember me?

I was there once. It was a hard climb out and it wasn't the lack of Faith in my God that was the problem....it was a lack of faith in man kind.

Hang tough......hold on to the one or two real friends you know you have.

For me...what started the journey back was a random act of kindness toward me. It was done anonymously and we can not make these things happen ourselves.

There is always hope and light. We just can't find it sometimes.

Marilyn

vandana
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Patricius
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463
USA
10 posted 2008-05-12 11:40 AM


good read
serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

11 posted 2008-05-12 12:23 PM


I think that numb feeling is kind of a protection, lovie.

I know people in the medical field who have to step back from empathy in order to do their job. Maybe that's akin to what happens with us, when shtuff keeps hitting the fan.

(and I know I owe you an "e" lovie...I just found the draft in my mail! Sheesh.)

Feel better soon, Mo. I love you.

Robert Frazier
Senior Member
since 2003-02-06
Posts 1014

12 posted 2008-05-12 01:33 PM


Hugs,
R

Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348
Florida
13 posted 2008-05-12 02:12 PM


Heres the thing with empathy...

most people look at you like your a freak if your empathic and make the mistake of showing it...so you learn to hide it, even if that means locking yourself in the bathroom and weeping because you feel what that 2 yr old felt as he was being beat to death by his mother...

Oh a good day life sucks on a great day it sucks a little less.

All that so you know I understand.  

"too bad ignorance isn't painful"
~Unknown~

ctowen
Member Elite
since 2001-10-18
Posts 2286
Green Mountains of VT
14 posted 2008-05-20 03:05 PM


Those moments where Life's mysteries turn sour ....

          .... the art of Romance, Heart, and Truth seem to have been thrown from the top of the deepest hole.


.... beautiful feelings you have nevertheless

Ct

Robert E. Jordan
Member Rara Avis
since 2008-01-25
Posts 8541
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
15 posted 2008-05-20 03:55 PM


Yo Nakdthoughts,

This is nicely expressed.  It's called "growing up".  Everyone is having it done, so you are not alone.

Bobby

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