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Open Poetry #42
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kudanesh
Member
since 2007-12-01
Posts 135
Peterborough,England

0 posted 2008-03-31 05:20 AM



My Time

Funny how time stands still funny how time goes so fast it makes you ill
When good times go and bad time stay
Don’t you wish it were the other way
Time does fly when you’re having
And it all slows down when you feeling glum
I wish I could keep my time
Put it in my pocket and call it mine
Then I could have all the time I need
To do what I want would that come under greed
Well if it dose I don't care
No one in the world would turn down free time anywhere
So all that's in the concept of time
Can be found all over you have to make up your mind
Of what you should do
And witch way to use it that's suits you
I hope you have fun with the rest of your time
I know I have wasted allot of mine so I'm so sorry I have to say
I have thrown too much of mine away

© Copyright 2008 Andrew Hull - All Rights Reserved
Seoulair
Senior Member
since 2008-03-27
Posts 807
Seoul S.Korea
1 posted 2008-03-31 08:47 AM


interesting! enjoyed the read.
Margherita
Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236
Eternity
2 posted 2008-04-01 12:45 PM


Dear Andrew,
another very good one! Wise too, yes, we should not waste it.
Love,
Margherita

effjayel
Senior Member
since 2007-09-30
Posts 1474
At the Crossroads of Infinity
3 posted 2008-04-01 04:02 PM


Andrew, "Time gets more precious when there is less of it to waste ... I enjoyed your post & the underlying message..a couple of  suggestions & a question.... you should  use spellcheck, I think it should be Don’t you wish it was the other way & not were the other way, Doe’s & not dose, and a lot as opposed to allot. Also, is the word fun missing from the end of line 4? Having seen your critique comment about your "Ghastly" spelling, I have a feeling I might have said something similar before. No offence intended by the foregoing...Cheers   John
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