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Open Poetry #42
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FNG
Member
since 2006-02-07
Posts 477


0 posted 2008-03-10 06:30 AM


Did you missed me,
Wherever you are, Daddy?
Hankering, my longing to lean on a Daddy.

Did you loved mummy, Daddy?
Dozens of doubts I have for you, daddy..

Did mummy's tears saddened you?
like they tore my heart and my trust in you.

Abandon us not, daddy.

Did the pleads in my eyes mattered?
The answer is plain when you continued battered.

Don't smash my love for you,daddy.
But you did, daddy.
And along went my memories for you.

© Copyright 2008 Danielle Tan - All Rights Reserved
ILoveTheRain
Member
since 2008-03-02
Posts 157
GA
1 posted 2008-03-10 06:49 AM


I'm sorry to hear this happened. It sucks... But hopefully things get better!
Jessica

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
2 posted 2008-03-10 08:16 AM


I know how that feels


Margherita
Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236
Eternity
3 posted 2008-03-10 09:04 AM


The sad feeling comes through and makes me want to reach out with a hug.

Love.
Margherita


Alison
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2008-01-27
Posts 9318
Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy!
4 posted 2008-03-10 09:48 PM


Sometimes writing helps heal the hurt.
Time works some too.

Thinking of you and sending hugs your way.

Alison

Talyn
Junior Member
since 2008-03-09
Posts 47
North Carolina, USA
5 posted 2008-03-10 11:28 PM


Personally I think Daddy was used to much but that is the name of the poem. Thats just my opinion, besides that I believe it is powerful and brings out emotion. Writing seems to be the best oulet for most of us. Thank you for sharing your work

Talyn

"Gang aft a-gley,
an lea'e us nought but grief an' pain,
for promised joy"
--Robert Burn

FNG
Member
since 2006-02-07
Posts 477

6 posted 2008-03-12 12:08 PM


Hi Talyn,

Now that I looked again, I think I can do away with 1 or 2 "Daddy"...

Appreciate your feedback.

Thanks all for your empathy and understanding. poems and tears heal. I look tough in real life but I'm quite weak emotionally. And I only feel safe enough to reveal them here.


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