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Open Poetry #42
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SEA
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with you

0 posted 2008-02-20 10:51 AM



I watched the gypsies dance for you
by the glow of campfire
a backdrop of midnight stars and wagons
in semi circle

I was shyer than I should have been
given the company…
but I was never one for crowds
or competition, so I quietly watched
envious at their lack of demure
and flustered by my clumsiness
~ I could never move that way….

I listened to the music
pretending your eyes didn’t trace curves
and wished only
for your eyes to hold me
the same way….
knowing damn well, they never would…


~SEA~



© Copyright 2008 S.E. A - All Rights Reserved
Robert Frazier
Senior Member
since 2003-02-06
Posts 1014

1 posted 2008-02-20 12:49 PM


how beautiful...how sad
and thinking that there are eyes on you!

Hugs, Robert

Marchmadness
Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271
So. El Monte, California
2 posted 2008-02-20 01:56 PM


Perhaps you need new eyes SEA. Two pair.
Beautiful picture Is that your work?
                                   Ida

Kristabell
Senior Member
since 2003-11-29
Posts 678
Portland, OR
3 posted 2008-02-20 02:17 PM


Wonderful work here.

K

"Nothing is impossible. Some things are just less likely than others." Jonathan Winters

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
4 posted 2008-02-20 02:42 PM


Believe in yourself...James
Indigo
Senior Member
since 2001-05-17
Posts 602

5 posted 2008-02-20 02:45 PM


it is often shy
that catches the eye of night
when the loud dies down.

Envy doesn't become you, Sea... your tranquil waters are what make you... YOU! :-)

Indigo

Marge Tindal
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Florida's Foreverly Shores
6 posted 2008-02-20 03:36 PM


AhSweetSEA~
I know for a fact that those Gypsy gals have got NOTHING on you~

Some can dance ... but they can't hold a quill to the talents of a poetess of your caliber~

LOVE IT~
*Huglets*
~*Marge*~

~*The sound of a kiss is not as strong as that of a cannon, but it's echo endures much longer*~
Email -           noles1@totcon.com     

Margherita
Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236
Eternity
7 posted 2008-02-20 05:15 PM


This is a very well written, passionate write. But gypsy eyes of fire won't last past dawn, when your eyes will rise and touch his heart with the purity of morning glow ...

love
Margherita


LeeJ
Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296

8 posted 2008-02-20 05:26 PM


outstanding, reading you is always such a joy

very nice seeing you

hugs
Lee J.

secondhanddreampoet
Member Ascendant
since 2006-11-07
Posts 6394
a 'Universalist' !
9 posted 2008-02-20 07:26 PM


interesting 'write!'

I'd love to see those gypsies dancing against that "backdrop of stars and wagons!"

Applause!!

Robert E. Jordan
Member Rara Avis
since 2008-01-25
Posts 8541
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
10 posted 2008-02-20 07:44 PM


SEA,

There used to be a group of Gypsies that would sing and dance for money on Kensington Avenue here in the hood.  They were very good, a wonderful memory your poem has brought back to me.

Bobby

Dark Stranger
Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631
West Coast
11 posted 2008-02-20 08:16 PM


ms suesea, perhaps the eyes of the shy one
are where the gypsy looks more often than you think?  enjoyed this one ms...indi is right with her comment

LindsayP
Member Elite
since 2007-07-28
Posts 3410
Australia, Victoria
12 posted 2008-02-20 10:06 PM



Don't under estimate your self SEA, I'm sure you shine in other ways for we are all

different. When we are lacking in one attribute we nearly always make up for it

in other ways and I'm sure you do. God Bless.

Lindsay

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
13 posted 2008-02-20 10:59 PM


but I was never one for crowds
or competition, so I quietly watched
envious at their lack of demure
and flustered by my clumsiness
~ I could never move that way….

~*~

And all the rest of it...

WOW, and well done!

Smiling here, at how far you've come.


Magicmystery
Senior Member
since 2002-02-13
Posts 821
Windsor, Ontario, Canada
14 posted 2008-02-21 01:13 AM


I understand you here, I have never been one to seek the center, feeling that everytime I tried to be there, I would lose my nerve, make a fool of myself. You wrote me well here. Shyness and lack of confidence diminished my ability to do even those things I do well. My self-imposed "therapy" was to sing on stage in front of my entire high school at least twice a year, even as my knees melted under me and my heart felt like cement in my throat. If I had never tried, I would have had a mountain of regrets. Sometimes you have to crack the shell from the inside. - Or you risk living your life and looking at the whole world through the green eyes of envy.

Sherry

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
15 posted 2008-02-21 10:14 AM


gawd

this aches so much to my liking


Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989

16 posted 2008-02-21 02:37 PM


Feeling the ache in this one hon, but gotta tell ya, them gypsies, they got nothing on you sweetie.     

Whats say we start our own bon fire and dance in the moonlight huh, with no one watchin but the stars and sky.  All inhibitions left behind yes??  HUGS

1slick_lady
Member Ascendant
since 2000-12-22
Posts 6088
standing on a shadow's lace
17 posted 2008-02-21 03:52 PM


Sea

your soul moves like water
a heart that trickles down
the very face of an angel
eyes that make stars drown
you are the Luna’s shimmer
precious sister to mother earth
your tears do not go unnoticed
the wind sings your worth

Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296
Purgatorial Incarceration
18 posted 2008-02-21 04:08 PM


I'll watch you like that!

"...lack of demure"

I like that. This is sad, yet somehow sweet - it's hard not to appreciate writing that speaks of true feelings and wishes, especially knowing that the realization of those wishes would rarely live up to expectations.


SEA
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Posts 22676
with you
19 posted 2008-02-21 06:15 PM


Robert~ thank you

Ida~ nope not mine but loved it thanks

Krista~ thank you!

James~ thank you, I do for the most part

Indigo~ you are right, it doesn’t…thank you

Marge~ love you lady

Margherita~  thank you

LeeJ~ thank you

Bruce~ you make me smile, thank you

Bobby~ I bet they were amazing to watch!

D~ thanks and yes, she is…

Lindsay~ that was so nice, thank you for that…

Kari~ you know that means the world to me…thank you!!

Sherry~ that’s cool that you did that even though you were scared. I’ve done stuff like that too, but the spotlight, is not for me…thank you

Dixie~ thank you…

Donna~ aww, thank you…

Slick one~ that is by far, the nicest reply…ever…

Kissy Face~ I don’t think I’d be that shy with you mister... you rock….

LynnFromCT
Member
since 2008-02-18
Posts 53
CT, USA
20 posted 2008-02-21 07:02 PM


you may be shy, but your writing is awesome. I could picture myself, on the sidelines watching the woman/girl who believed in herself enough to dance with abandon. that will never be me.
Artic Wind
Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080
Realm of Supernatural
21 posted 2008-02-21 07:03 PM


I watched the gypsies dance for you
by the glow of campfire
a backdrop of midnight stars and wagons
in semi circle.............................."

This is Just Perfect imagery!



ARCTIC WIND

brianbeaudry
Member
since 2001-07-20
Posts 410
Northern Ontario Canada
22 posted 2008-02-21 07:12 PM


It's wonderful to read your work again SEA. Sometimes that which we sould  pay more attention to is neglected...this reminds me to let my wife know just how much she means to me tonight
SEA
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with you
23 posted 2008-02-22 12:33 PM


Lynn~ thanks for understanding

AW~ cool beans! thanks

Brian~ awww that was really nice to read. Thank you so much, and good for you, it never hurts to remind the ones we love, that we love them!

Dee
Member Elite
since 2000-08-19
Posts 2330
Queensland, Australia
24 posted 2008-02-22 08:37 AM


I too am envious. I have had writers block for so long I don't think I could write with such style.

Dee

Stand straight and tall, not the reflection as others see you, but as you truely are.        Clearwater

SEA
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with you
25 posted 2008-02-23 12:01 PM


Dee...bah! I know better than that! You got mad skills
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