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Open Poetry #42
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secondhanddreampoet
Member Ascendant
since 2006-11-07
Posts 6394
a 'Universalist' !

0 posted 2008-01-26 10:36 PM


Winter Void

beyond barren hills
the last lonely cloud dances
in a cold sunset


© Copyright 2008 Bruce E. Adams Jr. - All Rights Reserved
TomMark
Member Elite
since 2007-07-27
Posts 2133
LA,CA
1 posted 2008-01-26 11:14 PM


Beautiful poem as always。

Above Wilson Peak
The first evening star twinkles
Fresh pink gets glitered

TM

Midnitesun
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
2 posted 2008-01-28 07:15 AM


I enjoyed the contrast between your original 'Zenku' and TM's reply!

Bruce:
beyond barren hills
the last lonely cloud dances
in a cold sunset

TM:
Above Wilson Peak
The first evening star twinkles
Fresh pink gets glittered

Margherita
Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236
Eternity
3 posted 2008-01-28 12:03 PM


Yes, same hour perceived differently ...

Beautiful vision, dear Bruce, I love the stillness and even the cold that you evoke, it's the longing for what seems absent, but isn't really, you know.

Loved also Tom's contribution, very lovely.

love
Margherita

ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353
Michigan, USA
4 posted 2008-02-01 08:36 AM


You captured the in-between of storm and reverence.  
Perfect cadence for this subtle moment.


Kahlil
Senior Member
since 2003-04-12
Posts 1881

5 posted 2008-02-01 09:34 AM


I feel the cold and stillness.  Nice work!
Artic Wind
Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080
Realm of Supernatural
6 posted 2008-02-01 11:50 AM


the last lonely cloud dances
in a cold sunset.."

I can just picture the cold Sunset behind some mountains

ARCTIC WIND

ArtSolstice
Member
since 2007-03-18
Posts 498

7 posted 2008-02-02 12:46 PM


Yes, this is the capturing of a very subtle transitional moment. As you read it, you can imagine breathing in the cold air and exhaling it warmly.
Bobby Jordan
Member
since 2007-08-13
Posts 491
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
8 posted 2008-02-02 03:03 PM


Secondhanddreampoet,

Ah, another winter worshipper.  Winter plays an enormous part in shaping the destiny and character, of northern people.  Not always for the good.  It’s just a matter of survival.  It’s sad, but so true.

Poor US and Russia.

This short poem is well done.  Good work.

Bobby

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