Untitled Poem - pipTalk Forums

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Kamelian
Junior Member

since 2008-01-14

Posts 21
Australia

0 posted 2008-01-15 09:13 PM

UNTITLED POEM

The emptiness of life
in modern Western society
The blankness,
Devoid of meaning, emotion
Threatens to overwhelm you
Devour your soul.

And so you fill your days
With idle gossip,
Cram your life with petty superficiality
And weightless issues
Stuffing the void
With cotton wool excuses.

Not daring to look
The lack of purpose,
Lack of meaning,
Lack of fulfilment in the eyes.

For reality’s
Cold harsh stare
Succumbs to no one,
Gives not an inch.

So you turn on your heel
And run away,
Back to the relative safety
Of the masses,
And escape while you think you still can.

While you still think you can.

Could also be titled “The Way I Don’t Want To Be”.

Midnitesun

Member Empyrean

since 2001-05-18

Posts 28647
Gaia

1 posted 2008-01-15 09:30 PM

WELCOME!
I loved the hard-hitting honesty of this piece, and look forward to reading more from you.

TomMark
Member Elite

since 2007-07-27

Posts 2133
LA,CA

2 posted 2008-01-15 11:18 PM

profound!! wonderful poem.

A warm welcome to this wonderful site and join us in other forums to talk about philosophy.

Tom

Kamelian
Junior Member

since 2008-01-14

Posts 21
Australia

3 posted 2008-01-16 07:53 PM

Hey, thank you for your kind words & for making me feel welcome

Roniece Dawson-Bruce
Member Ascendant

since 2000-01-29

Posts 5689
Sydney, Australia

4 posted 2008-01-22 04:48 AM

Amelia... a warm welcome to our blue pages.. I enjoyed your heartfelt piece.. look forward to reading more from you ... love RDB

Be kind at heart....for everyone you meet has their own battle to fight.........

Margherita
Member Seraphic

since 2003-02-08

Posts 22236
Eternity

5 posted 2008-01-22 06:49 AM

I understand you don't want to be like this.

A tough write, but sadly it holds truth. It's the decadence!

Very well written!

love
Margherita

Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius

since 2000-10-09

Posts 13989

6 posted 2008-01-22 07:57 AM

Your words are written so full of truth and I enjoyed the fresh honesty of this. Welcome to Pip place.

simon
Member

since 2008-01-14

Posts 440
London, England

7 posted 2008-01-22 09:19 AM

Loved it & Cheer Up! (only joking) Really well written post.....

Marchmadness
Member Rara Avis

since 2007-09-16

Posts 9271
So. El Monte, California

8 posted 2008-01-22 01:12 PM

Hi Kamelian,
Well written and so very true.
Ida

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

9 posted 2008-01-22 03:25 PM

Welcome to Passions, Kamelian. Please,
check your Email for a Very Special Greeting!

" It matters not this distance now " Excerpt, Yesterday's Love
~*~
KRJ

LindsayP
Member Elite

since 2007-07-28

Posts 3410
Australia, Victoria

10 posted 2008-01-23 08:18 PM

Kamelian, welcome to PIP, you will get great enjoyment out of posting your poems here. You have put a lot of thought into

your poem but I think you need to look on the bright side of things for there is so

much in this world that we can be thankful for. Think positive my friend and you will

find things are never as bad as you think they are. Good luck and keep writing.

Lindsay

icequeen
Senior Member

since 2001-12-09

Posts 633
FL USA

11 posted 2008-01-23 09:07 PM

Really, this is a refreshingly honest look through the eyes of another. I think we all see it on some days.
I like how you repeated the last line. It gave extra force to the piece.

Welcome to Passions!

~Caroline~

Kamelian
Junior Member

since 2008-01-14

Posts 21
Australia

12 posted 2008-01-24 01:15 AM

Hello everyone,

thank you all very much for your comments & welcomes... much appreciated

Thank you also for your email card, Sunshine

And for those of you who kindly offered words of support, thanks - I'm alright. That piece I actually wrote last October... it is more a reminder to myself to keep fighting the emptiness, & not get bogged down or settle for cotton wool, than anything else. I would be happy to think perhaps it may help others do the same & strive for meaning in life.

Thanks again!

EagleScorpion
Senior Member

since 2000-03-08

Posts 1644
Here, Now, Forever

13 posted 2008-01-25 11:22 PM

wow. i like the cruel biting honesty you portray here.

ohh

woe to the average american joe

poor old , overweight, oblivious, careless, slovenly american joe

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-16

Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA

14 posted 2008-01-28 02:08 PM

Fine writing...James

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