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Open Poetry #41
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Behind the Smiles
| Open Poetry #41 |
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Behind the Smiles |
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OwlSA Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347Durban, South Africa 
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BEHIND THE SMILES 21 September 2007 Lonely notes dropping singly from the flute like saddened leaves lost on the forest floor – touching mountain memories in long shades of blue letters lost before they were written in blood and ocean tears and rain singing lullabies that kill the singer - Owl |
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| © Copyright 2007 Diana van den Berg - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Sekishu Junior Member
since 2007-09-17
Posts 36 |
This is a good poem. I like these lines alot. "like saddened leaves lost on the forest floor" |
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secondhanddreampoet Member Ascendant
since 2006-11-07
Posts 6394a 'Universalist' ! |
A grand-fine ‘write’! I am most especially fond of: “notes dropping … from the flute like saddened leaves lost on the forest floor”; AND: “touching mountain memories in long shades of blue letters lost before they were written…” v. serious, sustained applause!! |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Diana, I think I know where this poem is coming from and I send my love, understanding, and compassion. Woeful, yet beautifully and poetically expressed. Giving you a warm, loving hug, Linda  |
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Marchmadness Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271So. El Monte, California |
What a wonderful poem, Owl This one really touched me. Idaa |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Wonderful flow...James |
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Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
OwlSa i have only read one of your poems, and this poem is my fav, out of the ones i have read of yours (1)LOL ARCTIC WIND |
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The Lady Member Rara Avis
since 2005-12-26
Posts 7634The Southwest |
oh Diana my friend you have touched the heart of the matter here "letters lost before they were written in blood and ocean tears" so wonderfully done so sad |
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OwlSA Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347Durban, South Africa |
Thank you Sekisho and Bruce for enjoying my poem so much. Bruce, from the 2nd extract you quoted (as opposed to making that one 2 extracts), my guess is that you realise that “blue” referred to both the mountains and the letters. If you did, thank you for seeing that too. Linda, you probably are right, about the subject matter. Even if you aren't, I am wrapping myself up in your compassion and your hug, and getting solace from them both. The poem is about my daughter. Thank you Ida. I am enjoying your poetry too, especially the one about the house. I don't have time to comment on all the poems I read, but I try to read as many as I can while I am online. I can only get to my computer over the weekend currently (well, at least until next Friday), but today is a holiday in South Africa, so I am allowing myself a little time online this morning. Glad you think so, James. Actually (hee hee!), Arctic Wind, you have read 2 of my poems, not 1! You also read and commented on "Is This Our Heritage?" in Open Poetry 38, a couple of days ago! But thanks anyway! Glad you enjoyed “Behind The Smiles”. Kate, like Linda, I guess that you too, knew where the poem is coming from. Thank you for your compassion and friendship and for enjoying my poem. - Owl |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Owl ~ I had a knowing that it was about your daughter. I remember... Loving, compassionate hug, Linda |
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ameteurpoet101 Junior Member
since 2007-09-24
Posts 18The island of sunshine, Jamaica |
I see so much truth behind ur words~ |
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Aimster Member Elite
since 2000-02-19
Posts 4297Charlotte, NC |
phew! this one hits hard and deep. such emotion you convey in just a few lines.... Take care, Amy "Life is not measured by the breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away" |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
You know, Diana ... I read this several times, and it wasn't until I thought of the sound of the flute, that I understood how completely you used imagery to explain it. Exceptional!  |
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LindsayP Member Elite
since 2007-07-28
Posts 3410Australia, Victoria |
Dianna, what a heart wrenching poem, written with such tenderness and deep feelings, beautifully done, my sincere heartfelt sympathy to you and may the sun shine upon you always. Lindsay |
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OwlSA Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347Durban, South Africa |
Linda, I thought so. Thank you for being you. Thank you for reading and your comment, Amateurpoet. I hope that doesn’t mean that you also have great sadness in your life. Thank you Amy for feeling my poem, though I hope it didn’t hit too hard! LOL. Thank you Martie for reading the first time, but even more for reading several times. I am glad you heard and understood the flute-drops so clearly. Lindsay, thank you for understanding so deeply. If only my daughter felt the same way. Incidentally, you are both in the same country, in fact, possibly at least vaguely near her. She lives in Kelso near Bathurst near Sydney. - Owl |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Such beautiful poignancy you've written... and the image is perfect! |
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OwlSA Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347Durban, South Africa |
Thank you, suthern. The sequel to this is I actually got a birthday email from my daughter and her 2 children - granted only 2 sentences from each person (loving messages from my grandchildren who love me [and the rest of the world!] and are very lovable - David is 9 and Samantha is 7), but my daughter's message was kind, if not loving. That made my day. - Owl |
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moondogz Member
since 2007-05-01
Posts 397Great White North |
very heartfelt poem OwlSA, thanks for sharing. |
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OwlSA Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347Durban, South Africa |
My pleasure, moondogz. Thank you. - Owl |
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Klassy Lassy Member Elite
since 2005-06-28
Posts 2187Oregon |
It is truly impossible to sing with a lump in your throat, the notes lost in the deepest chamber of a mother's spirit. I don't know the circumstance, but the sorrow echoes like wind in deepening shadows. May love dispel them all.  |
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GG Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532Lost in thought |
ohh this just aches of deep sorrow. Still, it is full of beauty. An awesome write. ~Alyssa Hupomeno. |
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296 |
Ohhhhh my, this took me to a place...that I don't want to be again, but was so bittersweet and enlightening in many ways...this poem for me, made me realize, that we must experience the bad as well as the good, to help us be greatful for life's loves... Hugs and thank you for the inspiration and the awesome penning. Love Lee J. |
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OwlSA Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347Durban, South Africa |
Thank you Klassy for your kindness and understanding painted in the exquisite poetry of your reply. I love my daughter with all my heart, always have and always will. I will never see her again, as she moved with her then-husband and her 2 children to Australia in 2000 from South Africa and won't be coming back and I can't afford to go there and I wouldn't be welcome anyway. I don't understand what the problem is, but will keep trying to understand and will never give up hope that I will regain her love that appears to have been lost about 20 years ago or more. Thank you Alyssa for your warm understanding and compassion. Do you have a new nom de plume or just the same name as an already dear Pipster? Thank you Lee. My heart aches for you that you have been in this place, but hope that I am understanding that you aren't any more. You can't know how honoured and grateful I am to know that it was enlightening and an inspiration to a poet of your stunning calibre. And huge thanks for the hugs - and hugs back! - Owl |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
Oh, I am so happy that someone bumped this beauty up....I hadn't read it 'till now! I could highlight nearly the entire poem, line by line, as a 'favorite' line. But those opening images are simply superb! |
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Roniece Dawson-Bruce Member Ascendant
since 2000-01-29
Posts 5689Sydney, Australia |
I can't believe I nearly missed this one... so beautifully written.. your heart shows in this one my dear friend.. families are indeed precious.. never give up on seeing your daughter again.. there will be a way.. RDB Be kind at heart....for everyone you meet has their own battle to fight......... |
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Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
I really enjoyed.. ARCTIC WIND |
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OwlSA Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347Durban, South Africa |
Thank you, Kacy. Smiles! You are obviously on a creative roll at the moment. Such a treasure chest of your poems lately. Thank you Roniece. I don't think there is any hope that I will see her again. If I could just get her love back, that would be enough. Thank you Artic Wind. I'm glad you enjoyed it. - Owl |
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
Dear Diana, this is a perfect poetical rendering of an almost unbearable pain. You touched my heart deeply. Love and hugs. Margherita |
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OwlSA Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347Durban, South Africa |
Thank you, Margherita - and you touched me deeply too. - Owl |
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