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Open Poetry #41
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Greeneyes
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Member Rara Avis
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind

0 posted 2007-08-19 07:04 PM



{From my Journals;
Mixtures of Thought-- Different Pages}



to my father


~~

I could not help but think of you
and if I was dreaming, why are you
so    haunting

the dark is never sweet

it is nothing but absence

even on hidden city streets

            I walked carefully trying to keep
sight of the road—

     {It began to rain}
I turned and saw nothing
I swear I heard your           spirit fly away

you were     always behind me

I wondered if you  noticed
how empty space can be
maybe filled with thought

           however, I doubt it

maybe filled with stones that slide
or branches that laugh

           however, I doubt it

I think possibly rain would speak
if it knew your    language

I use to lay awake for hours in September
         remembering the sea, and the noise of
the house{these are simple thoughts; they mean nothing}

– wondering how sound filled each space
how cold it could be sometimes   when you were there

yet I find no expression; no sorrow from any distance

just the remembrance of fingers
running over soft moss

I tried to keep sight of the road

then stopped to listen

to  stones embedded in earth and
the waves of light emitting from
thousands of closed windows

realizing we are
just strangers now
waving goodbye


~~**~~



~~**~~
Life is a balance
of holding on and letting go (KU)

© Copyright 2007 Lauren~ - All Rights Reserved
secondhanddreampoet
Member Ascendant
since 2006-11-07
Posts 6394
a 'Universalist' !
1 posted 2007-08-19 07:19 PM


A fine ‘write’ and grand ‘read’!...

I especially LOVE:

“the dark is never sweet

it is nothing but absence”;

“I think …rain would speak
if it knew your    language”;

“I use to lay awake for hours in September
         remembering the sea, and the noise of
the house…

– wondering how sound filled each space”;

And, the grand-fine ending:

“I tried to keep sight of the road
then stopped to listen

to  stones embedded in earth and
the … light … from
thousands of closed windows

realizing we are
just strangers now
waving goodbye(!)”

a most serious, sustained applause!!
                   ~

Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989

2 posted 2007-08-19 08:16 PM


L....  


    



each time makes me stronger...but after the fall....
we get back up and move on,
because the past is the past
and there is no tomorrow
if remaining in still waters
while the river flows on...~dmsmith~

Tim
Senior Member
since 1999-06-08
Posts 1794

3 posted 2007-08-19 10:48 PM


Nicely expressed with some great lines.
TomMark
Member Elite
since 2007-07-27
Posts 2133
LA,CA
4 posted 2007-08-19 10:54 PM


indeed beautiful and fine write. A wonderful one for remebering father.

Tomtoo

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
5 posted 2007-08-21 05:03 PM


Fine writing...James
LeeJ
Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296

6 posted 2007-08-21 06:08 PM


I use to lay awake for hours in September
         remembering the sea, and the noise of
the house{these are simple thoughts; they mean nothing}
I beg to differ...those simple thoughts are always the grandest miracles....

beautifully done

and it is so good to finally see you in there writing again....

I'm missing you

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