»
Archives
»
Open Poetry #41
»
A Shamble
| Open Poetry #41 |
|
A Shamble |
|
|
bel1e Senior Member
since 2006-07-24
Posts 1631
|
Such a shamble the late Summer rains have made of these 51 roses, slipknot petals, plush as flesh in the pricked clover of lawn, along cleft passages of coal burning the koan of wicks and spurs brand their reprimand into my heels, and barefoot the body slaves against its fiery pinions, bruising beneath the night’s blue wound, and swift, the violet moon catches its hook in my throat, draws its ache through our chain-linked blossoms along the pilgrim artery and stammels of my heart’s insomnia, hours now ‘till the cock ushers in the cult of day, under such midnight distances, eclipsed into this ample banishment of roses, where you wait, an exile and a sultry prayer upon lips to quell the sutra of my hands templed in yours, and shackled now to the hollow minuets that can no longer drown the cuckoo’s sorrow, and so I swallow the blurry downpour of melancholy as it burns and burns its crushed blue salts upon the bell cricket’s lament, that no penance or patent or prayer can lift, at last, vanishing into the body’s river silks, the marrow’s silt of ruined petals a shamble, strewn upon these abandoned chinks of light.  ...fromThe Caliban Ballads... All Rights Reserved. babygirLPress  [This message has been edited by bel1e (08-09-2007 06:57 AM).] |
||
| © Copyright 2007 babygirLPress - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Nice writing...James |
||
|
bel1e Senior Member
since 2006-07-24
Posts 1631 |
Thanx so much, James~ |
||
Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
"under such midnight distances, eclipsed into this ample banishment of roses, where you wait, an exile and a sultry prayer upon lips to quell the sutra of my hands templed in yours, and shackled now to the hollow minuets that can no longer drown the cuckoo’s sorrow, and so I swallow the blurry downpour of melancholy as it burns and burns its crushed blue salts upon the bell cricket’s lament, that no penance or patent or prayer can lift, at last, vanishing into the body’s river silks, the marrow’s silt of ruined petals a shamble, strewn upon these abandoned chinks of light." yeah~~~ you do it so well... the juxtaposed.. the layers... |
||
|
bel1e Senior Member
since 2006-07-24
Posts 1631 |
~Thanks, Chief~ ~for the peek inside (and always pass the layers)~ ~love you~ |
||
|
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
You take a rose beyond shambles, m'dear... It is good to read you again.  |
||
|
bel1e Senior Member
since 2006-07-24
Posts 1631 |
Sunshine! ~hugs back at you~ I've missed your steady hand... ~it is really a treat to read you again too~~~ |
||
|
Roysie Member
since 2007-08-05
Posts 102Canada |
This needs to be broken up with some rhyme. It has promise but reads too much like a run on sentence. |
||
|
bel1e Senior Member
since 2006-07-24
Posts 1631 |
Roysie~ thanx for taking a moment to read this...actually much of my writing does not rhyme at all...and what I post on these pages is not up for revision...but I appreciate your thoughts and the time you took to read this~ |
||
|
Roysie Member
since 2007-08-05
Posts 102Canada |
OooooooK. |
||
|
bel1e Senior Member
since 2006-07-24
Posts 1631 |
 |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
