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nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines

0 posted 2007-08-08 08:29 PM



Wrestling Thoughts

There's that strangle hold
choking me on hurtful tears
knowing I probably deserved it
even though the reason is not clear.

Ruined a life, told to me
unaware that artistic talent ruins a life
and getting ahead in those early years
wore him out, he said.

Truth, his coming out.
Maybe he is in his scared skin
knowing I am at my wits end
trying hard, working mentally
to tie things up, and even them out.

Giving up is too easy,
though my mind wants to,
and my body shivers in reaction
on one of the hottest days of the year.

I thought I was doing what is best for "us",
the us that no longer exists side by side
but distanced by those harsh words
wanting to break down any memories
that were created in happier times.

What is the use? Why try to be civil
when civility is lacking in his vocabulary
and the easy way to "get back at" is
to drag me down, pin me to the floor,
to win the wrestling match
just to prove he can.

Amazing how the day started,
losing the pal at PAY, rewarding myself
with a "spirit" of friendship at the local tavern
only to be berated by day's end,
inviting the discussion of necessity
but name calling rising to the occasion
to kill whatever progress I had made.

I hate days like this, when the only calm
is to relate feelings to an empty audience
knowing that no one can walk in my shoes
nor hold my hand as I begin
to pull myself back up.

M

"Love is not blind - It sees more and not less, but because it sees more, it is willing to see less."
(Will Moss)

© Copyright 2007 Wynter Bliss - All Rights Reserved
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
1 posted 2007-08-08 10:20 PM


I wish I COULD hold your hand...
facing a most recent scam,
reported to the pal of Pay
and just waiting yet to have my say...

knowing you as fair, I do...
comport with misery, this woe of two.




secondhanddreampoet
Member Ascendant
since 2006-11-07
Posts 6394
a 'Universalist' !
2 posted 2007-08-08 10:20 PM


For me, this is an INCREDIBLY ‘real’,
superbly powerful and emotive ‘write’!...

[perhaps it is because it seems such an
  accurate ‘snapshot’ of far too many of our
lives amid this “Runaway American Dream”
(in the wake of which most relationships
   likely ultimately succumb)!]

AND:

I have come to believe that the following
is also all-too-(sadly)-true’!:

“artistic talent ruins a life(?!)”

[only the pursuit of self-interest, money
(and the power it entails) are honored
in this land]

serious, long-sustained applause for
this most heart-felt penning!

[I cannot write such finely ‘realistic Prosetry’…
I grandly admire those who can!]

[This message has been edited by secondhanddreampoet (08-09-2007 06:07 PM).]

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
3 posted 2007-08-09 07:09 AM


would you believe me if I told you this  second "blow" of ego stems from a somewhat "civil" beginning of decisions needed to replace a roof which is all but falling off...and the criticisms of who and how I am choosing those who do it (with no cost to him). Never talk to someone who has been drinking~~ surprising what comes out of their mouths without thought(sometimes a good thing to at least know what their "truth's" are in their own minds)Anyway, it's a new day and I am no better off than yesterday.
SmartChick
Member Rara Avis
since 2001-09-23
Posts 7081
On A Journey To The Unknown
4 posted 2007-08-09 10:53 AM


Awwww Maureen, I am so sorry you are having such a bad time. I wish I could make you have a better day.
Roysie
Member
since 2007-08-05
Posts 102
Canada
5 posted 2007-08-09 11:20 AM


I feel badly if your going through a hard time but is this supposed to be poetry? Because it's not and it's not prose either. Please google Sylvia Plath and read all you can. That's how you write about turmoil in relationships.
Larry C
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286
United States
6 posted 2007-08-09 01:55 PM


Roysie,
Two things: First Maureen has checked her preferences for no critiques, so that makes your response inappropriate. And second, there are no judges and juries here about style or technique. Truth is Maureen is a long time friend in this place. She writes her heart, like many of us, and for those of us who have established friendships - it is enough. And since when are we supposed to write like Sylvia Plath. My daughter died and I didn't care about form I came in here and wrote my heart. Please reserve your criticisms for those who have indicated a willingness to receive them. Thanks.

If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane,
I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again.

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
7 posted 2007-08-09 03:01 PM


Thank you Larry,  for your explanation to Roysie, whom gives no information about herself/himself to tell me what qualifies this person as a judge and jury of my writing.

I have been writing long enough to know style, prose, format etc of poetry...and can write in any form challenged.

I wrote this in my own style for my own reasons and whether you know it or not this is the open poetry forum where anything goes
as long as it follows the guidelines which maybe you should take a moment or two and
read.
Thank you.

If everyone wrote as Plath or Shakespeare or any other  "known" poet, what a dull world this would be...
Maureen

Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
8 posted 2007-08-09 03:52 PM


I will second the motion asking you, Roysie, to read our guidelines concerning replies. If you wish to advise us what poetry is or isn't, be prepared to offer credentials which qualify you to do so. Even then, your comment would be out of line. If you wish to offer constructive criticism to a poet concerning his/her writing, it will be accepted gracefully. Simply saying it is not poetry and advising one to read another poet falls woefully short of that purpose. There are poetry sites where "slamming" the poet is commonplace. This is not one of them.

Maureen is an accomplished poet who has written in many styles effectively. She need prove nothing to anyone. She has the respect of many here and does not deserve such snippets.

We are always pleased to welcome new members and we welcome you. We simply ask that you familiarize yourself with our rules and our members before making comments that have no poetic value or assistance.

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
9 posted 2007-08-10 07:08 PM


Thank you, Mike.

And Sue, please take that computer to be fixed. There are some who would help you with the cost if needed.


M

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