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Open Poetry #41
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Huan Yi
Member Ascendant
since 2004-10-12
Posts 6688
Waukegan

0 posted 2007-08-07 07:06 PM


.


Willow—willow
Shall I sing for thee
Shall I sing for thee

Willow—willow
Shall I sing for thee
Shall I sing for thee


.

© Copyright 2007 John Pawlik - All Rights Reserved
Midnitesun
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since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
1 posted 2007-08-07 08:17 PM


Is this the chorus and we are to guess the song?
Huan Yi
Member Ascendant
since 2004-10-12
Posts 6688
Waukegan
2 posted 2007-08-07 08:37 PM


.


K,

This is not a creation
but rather a quote
of the dying,
(in fact I and others around him
thought he was already dead),
last words softly sung
by a relatively young man.

I thought to create my own context
but realized I would be foisting my own
intent on the last moment of a stranger
who deserved to be simply heard, (for whatever
reasons he had), singing his final breath.

Thanks for reading.

John


.

Hyaunt
Member
since 2007-07-12
Posts 74

3 posted 2007-08-08 12:08 PM


Shievering in his last song
the old willow bends down weeping
to untie her boat
---
If your poem has made me happy
Your comments certainly made my night darker. it is sad..

Hyaunt

aziza
Member Elite
since 2006-07-09
Posts 2995
Lumpy Oatmeal makes me Crazy!
4 posted 2007-08-08 12:18 PM


You know, I read this earlier today and was haunted by its simplicity.  It's beautiful just as it is (even without the explanation).

Thank you
Alison

Huan Yi
Member Ascendant
since 2004-10-12
Posts 6688
Waukegan
5 posted 2007-08-08 01:04 PM




Thank you both

Alison,

You touched on why exactly I thought
to leave it alone.

And ladies, the man, whom I had never
met much less known before, sang his
small song and died in a vivid dream
I had the night before I posted it.
It is the only time I can recall anyone
actually singing however softly in a
dream and I can still hear him, lying
next to me and a group of others as we
sat on an embankment near a set of
tracks at a small old railway station
out on some unknown country steppe.
I have no idea why it happened or what
if anything it means. It was interesting
that in the dream I wasn't at all alarmed,
yet the song did cause a sad
respectful silence among all of us
as we listened.

Thanks again

John
  

Hyaunt
Member
since 2007-07-12
Posts 74

6 posted 2007-08-08 03:01 PM


How very interesting. I read this poem as a pleasant one..as a cheerful young man running around willow tree in spring singing, who just had the first kiss from his dreaming girl.

After your explanations, I wonder how I can read this poem as one coming out of a nightmare. A soft hum before dying...


Thank you, John.

Hyaunt

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