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Open Poetry #40
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Savvy
Junior Member
since 2007-04-18
Posts 19
Washington State, USA

0 posted 2007-07-10 06:44 AM


(Taking a step back into the past)

The bleachers vibrated beneath me,
a loud groan of teenagers buzzing with gossip surrounds me.
A lone microphone boasts the words of a balding principal "testing... testing"
Heads turn, eyes focusing on the front of the gym.
A stuffed cougar flies into the air, the volume rises with pride as it goes up higher....higher.
It falls back to the floor and silence commenses into tradition as it hits the floor.
Senior Power is chanted, belted out from the lips all around me.
Blue, white and blacked all around.
My last homecoming assembly had begun.

© Copyright 2007 Kellie M. Cantrell - All Rights Reserved
Robert Jordan
Member
since 2007-02-07
Posts 392
Philadelphia Pa USA
1 posted 2007-07-10 02:25 PM


Savvy,

I really like this one.  It's one of the better ones.  Just two little corrections below.

"The bleachers vibrated beneath me,
a loud groan of teenagers buzzing with gossip surrounds me.
A lone microphone boasts the words of a balding principal "testing... testing"
Heads turn, eyes focusing on the front of the gym.
A stuffed cougar flies into the air, the volume rises with pride as it goes up higher....higher.
It falls back to the floor and silence commenses commences into tradition as it hits the floor.
Senior Power is chanted, belted out from the lips all around me.
Blue, white comma here and blacked all around.
My last homecoming assembly had begun."

Bobby

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