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Open Poetry #40
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serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738


0 posted 2007-05-22 03:05 AM


In the morning when you come
home to where your heart is hung?
Find it bleating like a bag,
strung with sinews of the young
lad you used to be, I know,
it's not so different to grow
sags of hags beneath the eyes
and claim them evidence of "wise."

You really ought to give it up.
The seroquel and sips of cups
deadly nightshade in the glimpse
of your future, now is this:

I beckon angels with a swirl:
I studied books Enochian.
I see ambition of the world
in this, St. Anthony's token:

and never once you offered prayer
you vanquished your protection where
you should have placed a broken branch
to mind the others of the path

to come for you, and rescue you--
your woman
now become your shrew
and thoughts of lost gratuity
comfort none who truly need.

And even if you bled your knees?
I'm a fool who would forgive
weeping at the thought of "please"
"Baby, you remember when?"

"Let us start anew again..."

Someone should beat sense in me--
but oh my love, it best not be
you who drank too deep of cup.
Your Queen is cold from lack of touch...

and her hymen grows again--
a shield of Crimson Chamber's Hall.

"Damn him, damn him, damn them all!"

and this is how, the knights grew dim,
She never suffered fools again;
she never wept a tear at all--

the shield of Crimson Chamber's Hall
chose the necessary end
of a love, so stealth and fleet:

The Queen forgave and graced the thief--
she crucified him
upside down...

© Copyright 2007 serenity blaze - All Rights Reserved
aziza
Member Elite
since 2006-07-09
Posts 2995
Lumpy Oatmeal makes me Crazy!
1 posted 2007-05-22 03:34 AM


Wow -- mesmerizing .. loved how the words flowed .. the rhythm ... the story .. and ...

and this is how, the knights grew dim,

I loved this a lot.
A

Drauntz
Member Elite
since 2007-03-16
Posts 2905
Los Angeles California
2 posted 2007-05-23 01:22 AM


this is a beautiful poem. I read several times.
and I love it. it is a real poem.

Thank you SB.


LeeJ
Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296

3 posted 2007-05-23 08:30 AM


not only a real poem, but absolutly filled with images....words of life...how cruel it can be, and yet, it always seems to me, you find humor in all things...love your attitude, and remember, it is because of our past we are who we are, and I'm so happy and proud you are here....

Luv and hugs
Me

divine chaos
Senior Member
since 2006-07-09
Posts 617
dancing 'neath the moon
4 posted 2007-05-24 07:39 AM


this is beautiful, serenity .. the rhythm is nearly hypnotic, so easy to get lost in. I love the way you write

Sheli

Paul Wilson
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2002-07-07
Posts 4711
United States
5 posted 2007-05-24 02:00 PM


Karen...Being a man i'm not sure if you want
me to reply or not.LOL
Great poem. I really liked the story behind it, getting older and not being a spring chicken anymore. The asking for forgivness and how some find another mistress in a bottle and how both parties suffer from loneliness.
This poem has real meat to it and that is great. Beautiful flow...Paul

~~To share my poems with you is to share my heart with you~~
Paul

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

6 posted 2007-05-24 06:02 PM




There's a bit more to this than the obvious, but yanno? I think I'll just let this be whatever ya'll want it to be.

Thanks to the brave souls who ventured, um, in--where even angels fear to tread.



Love you all!

Paul Wilson
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2002-07-07
Posts 4711
United States
7 posted 2007-05-24 07:21 PM


Tell us woman. Least we hang you from the gallows and leave your body for the rats to feast upon. Damn did I just write that.
I guess so.That is what I love about your poetry so much, I never really know for sure how to take it, but I love it...Paul

Drop me an e mail if it is a private thing.

~~To share my poems with you is to share my heart with you~~
Paul

Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348
Florida
8 posted 2007-05-25 08:19 AM


I get it all except the hanging upside down...is there meaning behind it that I am unaware of?

lack of touch
cold
cold
so cold

remember? let's go back...
it can be better


yes this was perfect for me back then and perfect for my mood today...

love you madly.

MGROVES
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2004-02-01
Posts 3802
california
9 posted 2007-05-25 11:22 AM


thanks for sharing

My spirit will rise
above the sea~
There will be no drowning
of my soul or me~

OwlSA
Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347
Durban, South Africa
10 posted 2007-05-26 07:15 AM


Magnificent, Karen, though I ache in your sadness.  I can't remember whether I have ever asked you - or whether you have ever told me if you have animals, particularly cats and/or dogs - my suggestion is, when you feel like this, hug them if you have them, or get them if you don't.  Mine do wonnnnnnnnnnders for me.

- Owl


icebox
Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 4383
in the shadows
11 posted 2007-05-26 07:49 AM




In the Hall of the Crimson King,
the hanged man
may unto bring the blade of vision sharply
set to cleave the stoutest shield
behind which hides a heart aflutter,
in its timeless yearning stalk
for love's sweet anodyne.


The Lady
Member Rara Avis
since 2005-12-26
Posts 7634
The Southwest
12 posted 2007-05-27 12:24 PM




"Your Queen is cold from lack of touch...

and her hymen grows again--
a shield of Crimson Chamber's Hall."

and there's the rub Karen
or in this case
not

perfection!

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