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Open Poetry #40
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Huan Yi
Member Ascendant
since 2004-10-12
Posts 6688
Waukegan

0 posted 2007-04-19 10:41 AM


.


Spring
Though leaves have not
As yet begun budding on the trees

A stream filled with the last melting snows
Ripples crystal clear beneath an old iron bridge

Birds have returned Robins on the lawn
Nearby a cardinal sings

Another year without you here
Sparrows under wooden eaves


.

© Copyright 2007 John Pawlik - All Rights Reserved
Drauntz
Member Elite
since 2007-03-16
Posts 2905
Los Angeles California
1 posted 2007-04-19 03:02 PM


John, this is very beautiful poem.  
Quietly wait for what you deeply long for.
Here is the season, the landscape,
the nature, the man made bridge,
the sound of the bird and the stream.
The feelings
in un-budding trees,
in not yet melted snows,
in old rusty bridge, and
in  the Sparrows under wooden eaves… love birds in pairs are busily building  their beautiful mud nest and can’t wait to have young and bring them up...(experience of my childhood in mountain areas)…which stirs oceans of emotions.

I would say more if I had a chance to teach this poem in the year of 2600.

There is a saying
Young ones make themselves believe that the sky is falling so they can write the most beautiful sorrow poems while old ones sigh “what a cool breeze in the beautiful fall!”

very beautiful poem.

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
2 posted 2007-04-19 03:54 PM


"Another year without you here"

This line placed where it is gives such a
gentle touch of melancholy.

Very well done John.

Hugs~Nancy

~ Trace my body with your words,
  in doing so, you touch my heart ~

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