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Open Poetry #40
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riverside_girl_ravens
New Member
since 2007-04-16
Posts 1


0 posted 2007-04-16 01:52 PM



She sits and she waits
For her suffering to end

She sits all alone
Because nobody knows

She sits and she wishes
That they would just listen

She sits and she thinks
Of the crap she got herself into

She sits and she remembers
That first drink of alcohol

She sits and she tastes
The smoke in her mouth

She sits and she desires
To pop one last pill

She sits and she knows
How it all helps her forget

She sits and she longs
To feel the love she once felt

She sits and she wants
To know she’s worth someone’s time

She sits and she hesitates
To leave it all behind

She sits and she wants
To run, long and hard

She sits and she longs
To try one more time

She sits and she’s tempted
To end it all now

She sits, and she sits, and she sits…

And she knows
It will never change
And it will never get better…
She’s doomed

~ Alexis Burton

© Copyright 2007 riverside_girl_ravens - All Rights Reserved
Drauntz
Member Elite
since 2007-03-16
Posts 2905
Los Angeles California
1 posted 2007-04-16 02:19 PM


how interesting the poem is. I have my whole sympathy to "she".
"she"'s life is poor
this poem made "she" poorer

enjoyed.

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
2 posted 2007-04-18 09:59 AM


quote:
She sits and she wants
To run, long and hard

She sits and she longs
To try one more time


I remember those times that
I wanted to run, and when I actually,
physically did...

I learned that I was not doomed.

You might want to stretch,
and see...for yourself.

Welcome to Passions, Alexis.

Please, check your email
for a Very Special Greeting.


" It matters not this distance now  " Excerpt, Yesterday's Love
~*~
KRJ

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
3 posted 2007-04-18 09:31 PM


Nice writing...probably won't get better until she takes some positive actions...we have some control over our happiness or suffering by the choices we make and the consequences that follow...James
INclan
Senior Member
since 1999-07-20
Posts 1024
Indiana, USA
4 posted 2007-04-19 01:50 AM


Intersting construction.  I enoyed the repeated phrase,"She sits..."  The poem keeps moving but She Sits.  Her [your] final conclusion is inevitable.  The poem will not get better or ever change because She sits.  Welcome to Passions, Rave On!

INclan

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