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Open Poetry #40
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What Do You Care?
| Open Poetry #40 |
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What Do You Care? |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced 
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I am in need of comfort, a place to rest my head, friends that understand my plea, but I have a void instead. I am only shot down for wanting to be in a state of numb, tired of the day to day, in my PJs like a bum. I pop open another beer and turn out the light, telling myself not to come here but I need it in the night. Too dark for me to go alone I question what is really home, I just want friends to understand and reach out to take my hand but I still feel so alone. A journey ahead of me I see and I push myself to tread, but the burden is weighing heavy and I'd rather lay down instead. |
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| © Copyright 2007 Dixie Lee Bullington - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Gentle Spirit Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989 |
Dixie, this is honest writing and I for one know these type of days. Remember though, dear gal, to never fear the darkness for that is when stars shine the brightest! Hugs.... |
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JL Member Ascendant
since 2004-04-01
Posts 6128Texas, USA |
Heartfelt sadness in your words... Big hug to ya! JL  Thomas, because thou hast seen me, thou hast believed: |
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ivordavies Senior Member
since 2007-01-10
Posts 739Chester, England |
Good verse here and meaning, but the piece, rhythm, and feeling would be strengthene by replacing the last word with dead.... Ivor |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
I have to disagree on the change of the last line, Dixie...because you know the rules of the forum, and you also raised the height of your understanding that while each day gives us what it will, you still extend the hand of hope to the light.... and for that, I'm proud of you.  |
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Drauntz Member Elite
since 2007-03-16
Posts 2905Los Angeles California |
felt your pain. enjoyed your writing. |
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The Lady Member Rara Avis
since 2005-12-26
Posts 7634The Southwest |
honest and real Dixie such raw emotion |
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EagleScorpion Senior Member
since 2000-03-08
Posts 1644Here, Now, Forever |
funny, i'm in pjs drinking a beer right now! live it up and have no regrets. somebody special will come along soon |
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MyEnchanted_Melody Senior Member
since 2001-05-30
Posts 1106across the land of dreams. In your heart, I'd always be. |
A journey ahead of me I see and I push myself to tread, but the burden is weighing heavy and I'd rather lay down instead. ------------------- I know the feeling. You'd better not give up. Thank you |
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OriginalNYGuy Junior Member
since 2007-04-14
Posts 14Texas,US |
I feel what you've written. We must strive to better ourselves day by day. You can always attain a greater knowledge of understanding and wisdom. That is key. Take risks ! Step out of your comfort zone. Trust in the unknown. |
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Huan Yi Member Ascendant
since 2004-10-12
Posts 6688Waukegan |
. Dixie, I was out for nearly two years Once I realized I wouldn’t starve things got a lot easier In fact downright pleasant Give yourself time John . |
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296 |
emotions we all have felt or feel at time, but still, a strength emits from these words, that maybe even you are still not aware of but nevertheless, sing loudly... hugs to ya lady |
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Startime55 Member Elite
since 2003-04-05
Posts 2148Alberta, Canada |
My heart goes out to you in your loneliness....I am glad of one thing and that is that you are writing your feelings out...that will bring about some healing....I can tell by your replies that there are many here who care about you and are reaching out to try and fill some of the void in your heart....I too send my love and understanding.....*Big Big Hugs* |
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BlueEyes Member
since 2002-08-30
Posts 152TX, USA |
Lots of friends with helping hands reaching out here... You just have to be strong and brave enough to take one... |
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stevebrklynnyc Member
since 2004-01-04
Posts 292GA, Camden |
Stop crying in you beer and crying wowies me. Its so old! If no on here has the guts to say it, STOP DRINKING!!!! Here is a little advice, its called sober which stands for son of a gun everything is real, I had to learn that a long time ago. Nothing in your life will EVER get better until YOU help yourself. The truth sucks, so I have heard, but I woke up so should you. If not, drink yourself to death, and let all of these authors blindly lead you on. I am not afraid to speak my mind. I have been through rehab, this is just total denial, wake up or one day YOU wont. Sorry for the brutal response, but I have read you for far too long and no one has had the heart to tell you the way it really is. Hope the honesty and truth sucks, its called reality. Steve. |
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stevebrklynnyc Member
since 2004-01-04
Posts 292GA, Camden |
The reply was not meant to hurt, but to inspire you to move on to a better life. When I was 20, I would have laughed at the advice, but the advice I give now is someone who is almost 40 and knows lifes lessons. Just want you to get better, dont take any offense, but you have to take the first step. I had to a while ago, it was not easy, but if you do, I promise you, your life will change for the better. Steve. |
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jwesley Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563Spring, Texas |
Well, you just cry in your beer all you want...my mother is 82 years old, divorced once and had two husbands die on her...and by the way, she's drank more beer and scotch in her life than I knew they could brew and still does. She's shed several billion gallons of tears, and still does occasionally, and still laughs and loves and remembers and feels pretty low at times too. So, you want to cry in your beer (it is your beer after all)...write about, or whatever...go for it my friend. You'll grow up when you're ready. We all do...or don't. Some can stop reading you if they don't like it. Others, like me...well I'll keep on reading long as you keep on putting it out. Oh, and I'm not afraid to tell you what I think either...that's why I do each time I reply...I guess I just think differently... And the wonder of being human IS that we can, each of us, think differently, isn't it? Gee, I wonder if Rabbits think differently than other Rabbits.... j. |
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stevebrklynnyc Member
since 2004-01-04
Posts 292GA, Camden |
Like I said, there was no offense meant, but sometimes the truth hurts. I have had my demons and then some. Life is short, so is the booze when you drink to oblivion regardless of family. I have had too many frinend and family die of this. I know where you are coming from. I am not triying to post hate and discontent. Only trying to get her to slow down or chill. Steve. |
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Savvy Junior Member
since 2007-04-18
Posts 19Washington State, USA |
Dixie, I have always loved to read your poetry because it reminded me a lot of how I often feel. But in reading this today, I didn't focus on how it felt or pertained to my life, but how much it was very much your life. I know the days that are hard and like its too much to go on and curling up in bed with a comfy blanket and a beer is like winning the lottery. I've had this experience way to many times in my young life. Recently, I learned a valueable lesson in life and I am going to share it with you because you have done so much for me in the past and if I could do something even as small as this for you it would make me smile! You are a beautiful person with a beautiful soul, and I really really appreciate that about you. You are always there when someone needs a shoulder. Now its my turn, I am extending my shoulder so that you can lean on it. I've looked up to you for the past few years, you are so strong and courageous, you have taught me so much about the real world, I thank you for that. I truly appreciate you. -Kel Speak only well of others, and need not whisper. -Unknown |
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Angel4aKing Senior Member
since 2006-09-27
Posts 1372USA |
Youare walking in my shoes again...how do you do THAT??? Sweet dreams friend!!! JulieAnn ~~~kingsangel~~~ |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
so many replies and I thank you each for the support and encouragement Steve, if I didn't know you but only as a poet here, I might be a little hurt by your reply, but I know where your heart is and I thank you for the tough love approach...might work, might not...who knows? You aren't the only one who had the guts to say what you said. I am grateful for friends like that. You've been there, you know the battle and I will fight it when I'm ready. Jimmy thanks friend. Your reply really touches my heart. I will keep writing as long as I can find the words and it's good to know people will always back me up.Kel, I am deeply touched by your reply. I had no clue you were there. It makes me happy to know that I've touched you and others along the way. That makes all the pain worth it. Thank you for sharing a shoulder. Every reply here has been precious to me and I thank each one of you. I'll keep this thread for moral support. |
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MindBodySoul Member
since 2007-01-10
Posts 196NJ |
It is a scary place to be alone and in the dark. Been in those shoes many of times. But I have always found, that in my darkness I have gained my strength. Don't let it keep you captive, use it to your advantage and find your strength within the darkness... Set yourself free!!! As dark as life seems at times, there is always beauty that will surround you. You may not see it, when in your darkest hours, but as long as you know that there is always a way out... you are a step ahead of the game.... Thank you for sharing.... Jen--->MindBodySoul |
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1slick_lady Member Ascendant
since 2000-12-22
Posts 6088standing on a shadow's lace |
agree or disagree love unchanged I am still here I’ve been alone and lonely un-alone touched heaven felt hell in such a way it still burns say how you feel whisper it scream it just say it cause it ALL helps all of my life I have fed into the lie about my life as a woman as others wanted it most things are such an uncomfortable fit today on my 50th birthday someone who loves me without any holding back gave me an incredible gift…a book called “on women turning 50” and I swear it has changed or unblocked me in ways I could never begin to tell you… I… like you… have loved unobtainable men who were either emotionally or physically unable to love me back in ways I needed…I put men and women friends on hold for the sake of (those) men I loved I have also neglected in my past not just to say but to demand what I needed and the respect I deserved. For me please get this book, I swear if I had had this in my 20s my life would have been so different. I know hurt and I know raw emotions…I have and do live them. Do not ever think you are alone…for you are not… I Am Here |
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stevebrklynnyc Member
since 2004-01-04
Posts 292GA, Camden |
Dix, did not mean to hurt or throw you under the bus. You have many friends here that care a bunch. If I was a little strong with the truth, sorry, I had to listen to that myself before I woke up. I know it is so very hard. Harder than you will ever know. But, when you DO take that path, you will know what I am talking about and you will be so very much stronger for it. I lost someone a long time ago because of drinking, one way or another. Dont go down my path. Steven |
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
quote: I think many of us can relate to such a mood, sometimes the burden is really heavy and while I don't open a beer (because I don't like it!), it is true that it happened that "I'd rather lay down instead". But there IS the light at the end of every black tunnel. And you are on the Path to healing ... after all you took the pen and reached out. Always powerfully. And well you did. I care. Love and hugs. I think all of the replies hold a message of love. Margherita  |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
I know that sometimes we get stuck in the place where we keep making the same choices and keep having the same outcome... Try an entirely different choice... for an entirely different outcome... tell me if this makes sense...James |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
goodness  you all have just overwhelmed me with such kind replies and James it makes sense totally thanks friendI am just about in tears reading all this again good tears mind you thanks every one of you and Steve...yeah I know. Thanks for everything..you are very special Helen, I will go get that book and call you with my thoughts ...thanks love |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
I just want friends to understand and reach out to take my hand but I still feel so alone. There are some depths of lonely that even friendships cannot soothe... but they can and do care while time strives to heal. This aches, my friend... |
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