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lost but won
| Open Poetry #40 |
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lost but won |
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296
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you were a portrait influential not entirely accurate but wrote elaborate awakenings upon my bare flesh insisting probabilities elegantly arched in a place where thought vanquished in the morrow's eve you pretended confidence an English charm indignation plucking wide eyes from my heart dared a gallery of paintings swept from a heavy cloak where music begins esteem twitching from the corners of your mouth light hearted spirit silhouetted your sweet unspoken wildness that I pretended not to see and played chess knowing without conviction whose king would grasp like black soot to a stone fireplace like a small whirlwind I stood in the center of your dining hall observing gray ash in architectural detail a gesture of defiance yes, indeed I was afraid but fear fed the swallowing that no expenditure could compare taking kindly to determination torrential perplexities from both our names you smiled while questioning the tour the assets I owned you were not in love~ you didn't know what hurt you most was the long pitted trestle table you found in that huge estate in my heart you threw my soul off that pedestal you bought fevered with agitation I puzzled your outbursts you sabotaged intelligence independence unmarried to any purpose you pretended a phantom who had forsaken great love being empty of women such emotionalism was not a part of your life's experience so you solemnly entered someone else's blond and bubbly kitchen screaming aggression, pretending to love and so forth and so on is how the story goes Your prospects were always inevitable soft promises of feminine dreams you were an expert marksman you backed into my car with true instinct eyes sparkling quit an excellent flirt fifteen hundred dollars later you stole my passport on a revisit and resold it like a harmless pastime you see, I was not all that naieve you were most certainly a change in attitude pilfering all I owned so you thought but from the maliciousness I bred imagination And was aware all the time you always came back whenever I wrote tears of the heart thinking it was always about you always bragging about your what you thought to be harmless pastimes not to mention how happy you are confidentially the more you feel you have to convince someone the less convincing you are rumor has it she still loves you imperiously what she loved was the performances you gave disdainful flares for inspiration the poet you pretended to be I must admit Was quit convincing Checkmate You win I didn't want to play anymore sometimes when you win you loose & sometimes when you loose you win I tried to write a love song about us but it's been way to long funny how last impressions own you thoughts [This message has been edited by LeeJ (04-05-2007 10:07 AM).] |
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| © Copyright 2007 Lee J. - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Good morning, Poetess Lee! An outstanding piece of writing. As per usual, I absorbed, visualized, and felt EVERY single mot! The following lines are a fine example of the wisdom in your ink: "the more you feel you have to convince someone the less convincing you are" ~ Si! No es verdad?!? Yes! Isn't that the truth! (I hope my high school Spanish isn't too rusty!  )May you have the glorious day that you deserve!  Linda  |
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SEA 
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
" you see, I was not all that naieve you were most certainly a change in attitude pilfering all I owned so you thought but from the maliciousness I bred imagination And was aware all the time" I completely loved this part, and the ending....fantastic!!  |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
LeeJ An amazing and elegant write. Your breath clings to the dew of the morn. |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Lee~ When I saw the title, I thought of the Lottery ... after reading ... I guess it sort of was, huh ? GREAT THOUGHTS here~ *Huglets*  ~*Marge*~ ~*The sound of a kiss is not as strong as that of a cannon, but it's echo endures much longer*~ |
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Drauntz Member Elite
since 2007-03-16
Posts 2905Los Angeles California |
beautiful. enjoyed. |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
Whoa....I think you have the checkmate in the end, sweetie! Great write! *hugs*.....jo |
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
quote: The above words transmit some memories I'd rather not have, but we are confronted with incredible situations in our lives. We learn, I guess. As always your words are like an immense waterfall that makes the reader listen in awe. Love, Margherita |
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JL Member Ascendant
since 2004-04-01
Posts 6128Texas, USA |
"disdainful flares for inspiration the poet you pretended to be I must admit Was quit convincing Checkmate You win I didn't want to play anymore"  Love the write, but these two verses are excellent. JL Thomas, because thou hast seen me, thou hast believed: |
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Honeybunch Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-29
Posts 7115South Africa |
You're a winner, LeeJ, no matter what! You see more than I think you would like to sometimes but that's a gift - treasure it! |
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Startime55 Member Elite
since 2003-04-05
Posts 2148Alberta, Canada |
WOW!!!!A Stunningly Powerful poem...I love it...it speaks to an inner part of me...WELL SAID....**Big Hugs** |
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