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The perfect poem
| Open Poetry #40 |
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The perfect poem |
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Titia Geertman Member Ascendant
since 2001-05-07
Posts 5182Netherlands 
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I need a poem that flows like rivers wild Choose perfect words that match each one in line I tap my feet until the sound is right And in the end I'll call this stanza mine Now that I got the first one off my chest I struggle with this stanza number two My muse has left and told me to my face "A perfect rhyme is just too much for you You write a language that's not even yours And miracles don't happen every day" I said "I know, but still I want to try So off you go, I'll write in my own way" And here I am, but perfect I am not Right from my heart, because that's all I've got My muse came back and she decided to write one too Ode to Winter When Autumn ends his glorious colour bright And all the leaves have fallen to the ground While trees are bending naked in moon's light The song of Winter makes a tinkling sound All shades are dimmed to white and greyish blue And hail will struck the fruits still in their sleep The soil is bare where once the poppies grew While weeping willows just can't stop to weep And suddenly the world has disappeared In layers of a blanket cotton like The gutters seem to've grown an icy beard From darkened clouds the lightening will strike In the serenity of Winter's cold Green shades of Spring awaken to unfold Like scattered leaves...my words will flow |
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| © Copyright 2007 Titia Geertman - All Rights Reserved | |||
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
yes, this is perfection! |
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Mysteria 
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Great! Love your winter transition picture, just lovely Titia. |
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SmartChick Member Rara Avis
since 2001-09-23
Posts 7081On A Journey To The Unknown |
Awwww Titia, I am so glad your muse returned. But, with or without your muse, you write just perfectly. |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Titia~ YOU are AMAZING !! What a talented lady ... I am so happy to read you ALWAYS !! *Huglets*  ~*Marge*~ ~*The sound of a kiss is not as strong as that of a cannon, but it's echo endures much longer*~ |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Titia! This is wonderful writing! It's so good to read you! In the midst of winter, |
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ivordavies Senior Member
since 2007-01-10
Posts 739Chester, England |
Titia, I loved your Ode to Winter, it was perfect in it capturing of the character of this season, and flowed beautifully as it painted the picture for us. I love the English language and occasionally see things in it, that whilst spoken are seldom seen in writing, this poetry carried one such gem: "The gutters seem to've grown an icy beard" I think it is possibly the first time I have seen "to've" written down and must thank you for it! Loved the poetry, muse or no muse.... Ivor |
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