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Open Poetry #40
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Shadows
| Open Poetry #40 |
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Shadows |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia 
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Dark shadows fall on concrete paved with bruises and disappointments. Tenement windows light up with 25 watt globes piercing the gloom like the spirit of Christmas pierces the cynicism of twelve months. Holland blinds, flat and dull are half drawn against the night and children retire early hungry and disillusioned. For tomorrow and the next day will be smudges of similarity as the swings hang empty of bottoms or warmth and the see-saws sigh for company in the rising wind while the children search among the rubble for traces of familiarity... and their old lives. a good commitee can decimate communication. |
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| © Copyright 2007 Lynne Dale - All Rights Reserved | |||
Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Kethry~ There is stark reality in your thoughts ... and you paint it so real~ 'Dark shadows fall on concrete paved with bruises and disappointments.' So very original are your poetic thoughts ... this is a marvelously descriptive piece~ *Huglets*  ~*Marge*~ ~*The sound of a kiss is not as strong as that of a cannon, but it's echo endures much longer*~ |
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trutodaraiders Senior Member
since 2006-12-02
Posts 820CA |
Enjoyed the read..~Bill |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Kethry A remarkable write. Very well done. |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
What was the actual date of this write, Keth? If before Christmas, stark reality of what some will, or won't receive; if after the holiday, again, stark reality of what magic can't remove... overall, an excellent job, which is, of course, you. Thank you for coming home. |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
sunshiney one, the actual date of this poem was 26th January...our Australia day and I was thinking of the troops in Iraq or Afghanistan or somewhere and wondering what the children there played on? a good commitee can decimate communication. |
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sewasham Senior Member
since 2006-09-11
Posts 714Oklahoma, USA |
Stark realism. Very nice. Take care and Have fun. Steve |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
I wish I had enough money to be able to give the chilrden all over the world a good life like I had growing up... touching piece |
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Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
can't be much, can it....Nice "seeing you", good morning Keth. |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Hi, Keth! Pleased to see you posting again! "Tenement windows light up with 25 watt globes piercing the gloom like the spirit of Christmas pierces the cynicism of twelve months." ~ Powerful images and sentiments! As Scrooge did say after the light went on in his miserly humbug head: "God bless the children! ~ Each and every one!" Love & God's Light, Linda |
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Marsha
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423Maidstone Kent England |
Beloved one NO ONE writes half so well or so realistically. The scene is so stark, the picture so clear it is as if I were watching the news. Outstanding writing, why oh why can’t I write like you? I know if wishes were horses beggars would ride, Oh well at least I am T.P.O. (at least I hope so) although darling one you know I shall never have half your talent, I shall have to get by on charm, or smoke and mirrors whichever works best. Truly amazing writing and you know I love it don’t you. like you forever Mushy x x x x x x x Tomorrow is another day I don't know what it holds |
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Roniece Dawson-Bruce Member Ascendant
since 2000-01-29
Posts 5689Sydney, Australia |
Kethry.... awesome write!  RDB Be kind at heart....for everyone you meet has their own battle to fight......... |
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seraphin Senior Member
since 2000-09-24
Posts 1004Michigan |
Stark. Very vivid and done to perfection. Wonderful read. |
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Ratleader
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass |
This is....a little too good, a little too real, a little too true, for me. It triggers....what it triggers, in me....and makes me shiver. That's all I'll say. ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº> |
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The Lady Member Rara Avis
since 2005-12-26
Posts 7634The Southwest |
very powerful work "For tomorrow and the next day will be smudges of similarity" |
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wredgranny Member
since 2006-11-18
Posts 493Ky. USA |
Siyo I know many such places,and such children here in the land of milk and honey,you tell their story so very well and my heart thanks you for reminding others not all life is sunshine and roses.
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Interloper
since 2000-11-06
Posts 8369Deep in the heart |
Well done  Poet, said my Muse to me, look in thy heart and write. |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
and children retire early hungry and disillusioned. For tomorrow and the next day will be smudges of similarity as the swings hang empty of bottoms or warmth and the see-saws sigh for company in the rising wind while the children search among the rubble for traces of familiarity... and their old lives. Oh, my.... I know I copied almost the entire poem... but the pictures you paint so vividly with your words are ones I can't do justice to with my words... This is magnificent!! |
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