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Shani Graves
New Member

since 2008-11-18

Posts 1

0 posted 2008-11-18 01:21 PM

Sometimes I wonder if we broke up for the best
or was it just a challenge to put our love to a test

because the feeling that i feel
when i'm with you is so surreal

I know it had to be something special from the start
but i never imagined that 1 day we'll actually be apart

I kinda wish you were here
give you that love and compassion
because in my heart is where your love appears

I miss your hugs and your kisses, and those late nights on the phone
Now i'm here and your not..you got me feeling all alone

You said you didn't wanna express how you feel
because you were afraid you would get hurt
but babe your feelings safe with me
just wanna give you that feeling of comfort

You told me that you fell for me
and that you would never hurt me
but then you decided to take a break
and put someone else there before me

But i'm past that now
because i know in some time you will realize
and every one deserves a 2nd chance
that's the way i see it in my eyes

So now we separated
Not gonna lie I kinda hate it

Just wish we could start over and give it a try
because i promise to show you that i'm all you ever needed
and im needing you because your love got me on a natural high.

SEA

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 2000-01-18

Posts 22676
with you

1 posted 2008-11-18 11:53 PM

Welcome to Pip!

*please check your email for a special greeting!

AcousticPen
Junior Member

since 2008-12-01

Posts 13
Florida USA

2 posted 2008-12-01 04:10 AM

That was really heartfelt and if they havnt already maybe the person to whom this refers should read it. Sometimes all it takes is for someone to know how you feel for them to give those feelings the attention they deserve. Anyways I hope if this was inspired by true events everything works out for the best.

-Scott Vukelic

rhia_5779
Senior Member

since 2006-06-09

Posts 1334
California

3 posted 2008-12-01 10:14 PM

This is good- its got a lot of emotion in it. Only thing I would say is some of the rhymes are somewhat forced or they almost take away from the emotion of the power. You don't actually need much of the rhyme to make this work- its emotional and powerful enough just with the way you expressed it. NIce write! I agree that maybe the person this is written for should see it!
Rhia

hunnie_girl

Member Elite

since 2006-06-18

Posts 2567
Canada

4 posted 2008-12-01 11:12 PM

great first post!!! I loved every word every line. I've been there I'm pretty sure everyone had at one point. It's an awful feeling it reallt is.. you'll be okay and you'll move on it might take awhile but it will all work out for the best

Welcome to Passions I hope you enjoy it here as much as I have and do.
Krysti

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