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Teen Poetry #8
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RenaissanceRomanceRunsRed
Senior Member
since 2007-06-11
Posts 1062
In Love <3

0 posted 2008-07-06 09:55 AM



How You Left Me There

Ever story has its start,
And ours has just begun
We’re fighting down the tempest
But who can say we’re done?

Waiting in the dark
For a new moons face to see
Forgetting that nothing will be there
In visibility

Bird’s song keeps our time
Till evening turns the tide
The cricket takes his noisy turn
In the night we run and hide

Was it really worth it all?
To turn you’re back away?
And send me flying to open arms
Where I’ll always stay,

The story end with a single tear
That froze on lady’s face
Hurting more than you could see
Scattering in haste

You broke the tide of promise
You cut without a care
And for forever I will know
How you left me there


"Lucy: I think you are the most selfish person on the planet. George: Well that's just silly. Have you met everyone on the planet?"

© Copyright 2008 RenaissanceRomanceRunsRed - All Rights Reserved
BrittanyJ
Member
since 2007-06-03
Posts 461
Come find me?
1 posted 2008-07-06 05:12 PM


"You broke the tide of promise
You cut without a care
And for forever I will know
How you left me there"

Aw, this is so sad I liked it tho!

If you love someone, let them go. If they come back, they were always yours. If they don't, they never were.

Falling rain
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Member Elite
since 2008-01-31
Posts 2178
Small town, Illinois
2 posted 2008-07-06 05:27 PM


Very sad, but very good.. Well done.

~Zach~

"And so the lion fell in love with the lamb....,"he murmured. "What a stupid lamb," I sighed. "What a sick, masochistic lion."

Clockwork_Orange
Senior Member
since 2007-03-23
Posts 620
Space Camp, IN
3 posted 2008-07-06 10:08 PM


Ever story has its start,
And ours has just begun
We’re fighting down the tempest
But who can say we’re done?

Waiting in the dark
For a new moons face to see
Forgetting that nothing will be there
In visibility

Bird’s song keeps our time
Till evening turns the tide
The cricket takes his noisy turn
In the night we run and hide


i loved these stanzas the best. i loved this one more than usual. great job!

RenaissanceRomanceRunsRed
Senior Member
since 2007-06-11
Posts 1062
In Love <3
4 posted 2008-07-07 12:59 PM


aww thanks orange, your praise always means the most to me, getting your approval means the poem was good, thanks.

-Kate

"Lucy: I think you are the most selfish person on the planet. George: Well that's just silly. Have you met everyone on the planet?"

Earl Robertson
Senior Member
since 2008-01-21
Posts 753
BC, Canada
5 posted 2008-07-07 01:43 PM


Well I had to read this a few times but now I think I understand.
Well done, this was an exellent and interesting read!

Be who you are
And say what you feel
'Cause those who mind don't matter
And those who matter don't mind
-Dr Suess

RenaissanceRomanceRunsRed
Senior Member
since 2007-06-11
Posts 1062
In Love <3
6 posted 2008-07-07 07:36 PM


waht do you think frank, what have you figured?

"Lucy: I think you are the most selfish person on the planet. George: Well that's just silly. Have you met everyone on the planet?"

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