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Teen Poetry #8
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Newman
New Member
since 2008-04-10
Posts 5


0 posted 2008-04-10 12:58 PM


You couldn’t be more perfect
I’m so in love with you
You say you feel the same
I just really hope that’s true

I don’t know how to show you
How much you mean to me
I want you more then anything
Wish I could make you see

You give me reason to smile
You give me reason to breathe
We could be perfect together
Least that’s what I believe

If only you were mine my princess
I would give you the world
Cos the only thing I want right now
Is you to be my girl

Your brown eyes they call out to me
You’r lips scream to be kissed
And now I’ve got these feelings
That I didn’t know exist

I'l l tell you now that you're the one
Though I don't know what that\s worth
To me my love ,you're everything
My sun, my moon, my earth

You couldn’t be more perfect
I’m so in love with you
You say you feel the same
I just really hope that’s true

im 19 , im not a great poet, i don' claim to be. i just want feedback on my work.

© Copyright 2008 Newman - All Rights Reserved
hiddensmiles
Senior Member
since 2008-02-07
Posts 514
at the beach... i wish
1 posted 2008-04-10 06:55 PM


very good write i like how you ended it the way you started it !!

JJ

hunnie_girl
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2006-06-18
Posts 2567
Canada
2 posted 2008-04-11 01:03 AM


I like this sooo sweet... Hope to read more soon
Krysti

wisdomofthesword
Member
since 2007-12-17
Posts 224
the last place on earth
3 posted 2008-04-11 05:18 AM


good write mate, really like it

I don't care if you think I'm a fool but don't ever tell me so

ShawtySheFly
Member
since 2007-12-19
Posts 71
In his Elevator (LOL)
4 posted 2008-04-11 11:46 AM


good poem wow your pretty good being first here i lik your poetry keep it comin n fly

I.>ROCK"my<Converse^cuz%i'm`RETRO*likeDAT

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