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Teen Poetry #8
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rebelangelv
Senior Member
since 2007-05-28
Posts 538
usa

0 posted 2007-12-03 12:27 PM


this is dedicated to my swim family : i love you guys!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i hope it makes u guys laugh :]

btw i think i got a little rusty about half way thru so n e comments or critque would be grea :]


Our hair is green
Our skin is dry
We smell like chlorine
But we’ll swim till we die!

Swimming is our sport
Swimming is our passion
It’s probably a little more than that
Probably more like obsession

There’s the crazy coach named Mike
That’s bigger than a bus
He drives us all insane
Cause all he does is yell at us!

But somehow despite the coach
We stick it through thick and thin
And after all those tortuous sets
We sure as hell better win!

Then we have Sam
Who’s got the dirtiest mind
But dressed in all those Hollister clothes
He’s looking really fine!

But deep down he’s really a sweetie
And Sam will always make you laugh
That’s just who he is
And you certainly can’t beat that!

And then there is Kimberly
Or better known as Kim
She’s the most dedicated of all
Her life revolves around swim!

But you better watch out for her
Cause she might pummel you to the ground
Make sure you’re really good
Whenever that violent Devil is around!

Still there is Dennis
We also call him Dj
No he’s not a music mixer
But you’ll smile at everything he’ll say

Dennis is the goodie two shoes
Of our lovely team
But he’ll get down and dirty with us
Without even a plea!

Andrew is the cookie monster
In fact he’ll eat everything he sees
At least until he’s writhing on the floor
And in the pool he sinks

His vocabulary is very limited
The only comeback he has is “You’re face!”
But it’s probably cause all he does
Is text and talk on MySpace

Finally there is Leah
The one who’s always on drugs
She laughs at every little thing
And all she does is talk!

Her cell phone is glued to her ear
She’s such a valley girl
But she got that ghetto in her
From being part of the swim world

Like Nathan, Alex, and Sarah
There are others on our team
But they’re too fast for us
And will always take the lead

Still there are others
Who quit long ago
Jacob, Phillip and Louie
Are just a few of those lame-os

Yes our team is a family
And we survive as one
Although we may not win
We can still laugh when the day is done

Our hair is green
Our skin is dry
We smell like chlorine
But well swim till we die!!!!!!!!

Swimming is the best sport
And I’ll tell you all again
The reasons why our team
IS THE BEST THERE’S EVER BEEN!


If i had to choose between you and breathing, id use my last breath to say "I love you"  

© Copyright 2007 leah nelson - All Rights Reserved
wolf girl
Member
since 2007-12-03
Posts 150
washington, US
1 posted 2007-12-03 08:27 PM


i loved it im a simmer too so i can totally relate. i love the poem.
rebelangelv
Senior Member
since 2007-05-28
Posts 538
usa
2 posted 2007-12-03 08:29 PM


thanx and welcome to passions!!! yea this is really filled with alotta inside jokes and things so it kinda only works for my n my friends but i thought id post it up n e way ...get some critque maybe make a few ppl laugh :]

If i had to choose between you and breathing, id use my last breath to say "I love you"  

Assassin_of_Verse
Member
since 2007-10-23
Posts 330
that So Cal
3 posted 2007-12-03 08:35 PM


Haha! I keep telling myself to write a poem just about my friends, but it looks like you beat me to it! Made me laugh, since I used to swim, and brought back some funny memories...

Had a good beat to it, which is pretty hard to keep going. Ryhme was strange some parts (Hollister was kind of akward) but it kind of fit with the overall poem.

BTW: Reading this kind of shocked me since I haven't seen this side of you. I guess if we wrote serious poems all the time, we'd go nuts!

We are each of us angels with only one wing. And we can only fly by embracing each other.
-Luciano De Creshenzo

An assassin-in-training shouldn't.

rebelangelv
Senior Member
since 2007-05-28
Posts 538
usa
4 posted 2007-12-03 08:39 PM


thanx! yep this whole thing is inside memories but there was wayyy too many to put all in there and most wouldnt make sence n e way
thank u and yea i know ...i had some troubles with some of the rhymes at some points...hollister is all he wears all the time!!! so i had to put that in there lol but yea ur right it doesnt quite fit...but yea i always tell him hes sexii in hollister so yea..lol
yea most of the time when im uposet my heart is so full i let it out in writing but sometimes i feel like writing random stuff too :] thanx again :]

If i had to choose between you and breathing, id use my last breath to say "I love you"  

justanotherstorm
Member
since 2007-10-24
Posts 321

5 posted 2007-12-03 11:04 PM


i h8ted it and i h8 swimmers well i dont h8 all swimmers i guess it was ok not really well i dont know hmm..
hunnie_girl
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2006-06-18
Posts 2567
Canada
6 posted 2007-12-04 01:33 AM


Love this Leah greatness rolled in one poem
love ya
Krysti

rebelangelv
Senior Member
since 2007-05-28
Posts 538
usa
7 posted 2007-12-04 06:48 PM


stormy: ur a dork
hunnie: awww thanx! i luv ya 2!!!

If i had to choose between you and breathing, id use my last breath to say "I love you"  

surf_painter
Member
since 2007-04-10
Posts 434
Canada
8 posted 2007-12-04 10:30 PM


wow it was definitely an entertaining read and i liked it alot you must be very dedicated to your swim family
rebelangelv
Senior Member
since 2007-05-28
Posts 538
usa
9 posted 2007-12-04 10:31 PM


hehehe hell yea i am!!!!! thanx again

If i had to choose between you and breathing, id use my last breath to say "I love you"  

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