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pen&paper
Senior Member

since 2006-06-06

Posts 513

0 posted 2007-11-30 05:31 PM

♥I hate him for the way he treats her
When he's home
She needs a little consolation
Yet he screams at her to get off the phone

Hell is where she lives
And its kinda sad school seems like heaven
But every time like a pheonix
From the ashes she will have risen

So when he burns her down
I'll pick her up off the ground
Always there with a hug and a hand
I'll try to make her smile so maybe she can stand

Then we'll laugh and forget for a while
Everything he said
I hope it wont matter so much
If she's with her very best friend♥

[This message has been edited by pen&paper (12-02-2007 04:31 PM).]

RevengeIsMine
Senior Member

since 2006-07-08

Posts 820
Australia

1 posted 2007-12-01 12:30 PM

PEN PEN PEN.. Take a bow girl... This is great great work... i adore each bit of it.. i'm so impressed... love it all.. wat an amazing talent you are

jbal892
Member

since 2007-11-25

Posts 58

2 posted 2007-12-02 03:52 PM

I liked it! You said you wanted help with the title, you could name it Rise From the Ashes or something along those lines, just a suggestion.

rebelangelv
Senior Member

since 2007-05-28

Posts 538
usa

3 posted 2007-12-02 08:19 PM

awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww this is soooooo cute despite the topic of write!!!! i loved it it was awsome!!!!

Then we'll laugh and forget for a while
Everything he said
I hope it wont matter so much
If she's with her very best friend¢¾

those last two lines are like soooooo adorable!! i just loved it!!!!

If i had to choose between you and breathing, id use my last breath to say "I love you"

sexykitten15
Junior Member

since 2007-07-22

Posts 34

4 posted 2007-12-03 06:29 PM

jeezz i LOVED this... omg!

Artic Wind
Member Rara Avis

since 2007-09-16

Posts 8080
Realm of Supernatural

5 posted 2007-12-11 07:49 PM

Enjoyed

ARCTIC WIND

pencil&paper
Member

since 2006-09-09

Posts 76
asleep somewhere in my head

6 posted 2007-12-17 02:20 AM

hey i told you before but i'll tell you again that really like this one and i like jbal892's name for it

"Those who danced were thought to be quite insane by those who could not hear the music."~Angela Monet

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