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Teen Poetry #8
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Derek
Junior Member
since 2007-10-20
Posts 38
New Hampshire, USA

0 posted 2007-10-24 08:00 PM



I havn't givin this poem a title yet, so if you could help me with ideas that would be great. I wrote this poem about a good friend that is moving.

"There are so many words, I would like to say,
but you have your life to live, so I can't ask you to stay.

Why can't I say good-bye
to the friend I love so much.
I will never ever forget,
The way my heart's been touched.

You brought me up when I was down,
just your smile, would remove my frown.

You are the best of friend,
that will never end.
Thinking of me and the friendship there,
just shows me that you still care.

I wish I could heal,
but its ever so hard,
I want you to know, just as I feel"


© Copyright 2007 Derek - All Rights Reserved
hunnie_girl
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Member Elite
since 2006-06-18
Posts 2567
Canada
1 posted 2007-10-24 08:36 PM


wow This was so good for a first post.. I loved it a lot so much feeling emotion everything.. Welcome to Passions.. hope to read more soon.. and I am really not good with titles but how about like "don't go" or "I wish you'd stay" ok so i just proved i am really bad with titles (kinda really simple minded) haha
Krysti

Assassin_of_Verse
Member
since 2007-10-23
Posts 330
that So Cal
2 posted 2007-10-24 08:47 PM


Losing a friend is hard to go through. Why not dedicate your peom to your friend and name it in a way that reflects your friendship.

The more you know, the more you know you don't know. -Socrates

Only at TroyT...

RenaissanceRomanceRunsRed
Senior Member
since 2007-06-11
Posts 1062
In Love <3
3 posted 2007-10-24 09:11 PM


"giving up selfish"

that's my idea for you. hope it helps, maybe it will inspire you. . . i liked it by the way, the poem, just make sure that your are going to be strong and prominent in her life before she leaves.

-Kate

"I thought I'd just mention in passing . . . I always wanted a Sparkly of my very own." -Jeremy The Crow

Ringo
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Member Elite
since 2003-02-20
Posts 3684
Saluting with misty eyes
4 posted 2007-10-24 09:28 PM


Welcome to Passions!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What would you attempt to do...if you knew you could not fail?.
www.myspace.com/mindlesspoet

RevengeIsMine
Senior Member
since 2006-07-08
Posts 820
Australia
5 posted 2007-10-24 09:45 PM


Great first poem welcome to PIP.. as for the title go with Kate's its excaty what it needs..

hunnie_girl
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Member Elite
since 2006-06-18
Posts 2567
Canada
6 posted 2007-10-26 12:19 PM


yes, I do love Kates titles now I know who to trun to when I need help with a title XD
Krysti

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