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Teen Poetry #8
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myheartbleedsrazorblades
Junior Member
since 2007-06-11
Posts 13
Canada

0 posted 2007-06-12 08:58 PM


You cannot see me, you do not know me
But I know you, your thoughts, everything.
Every dirty little secret, every white lie
Everything you've ever done to be ashamed of.
But don't fret young one - I'm not your enemy
I'm not your friend either.
Hell, I'm not even your ally, I'm just here.
Get used to it, don't be frightened
Everybody has one, some are just more vocal.
Don't tell me you don't deserve this, that your a good person
Heck, hasn't everyone done at least one thing good with their life?
It's the things we do bad that really, truly define us.
More importantly however it's what we do to change those things,
Those miserable, heart wrenching things that you can't cope with.  That drive you crazy at night.
Nobody's perfect though keep in mind.
Just thought I'd give you my opinion.
So although you can't see or even know me
I do know you, your thoughts... everything...



© Copyright 2007 Chris D. - All Rights Reserved
surf_painter
Member
since 2007-04-10
Posts 434
Canada
1 posted 2007-06-12 11:23 PM


i liked i liked alot one thing to consider maybe putting into the poem would be to possible put what the "thing" is the way i read it it sounded like a conscience almost still keep up the good work
hunnie_girl
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2006-06-18
Posts 2567
Canada
2 posted 2007-06-14 01:13 AM


omigosh Chris you have a serious side to you. Liked the serious side. you should bring it out more often:P great poem.
hunnie.

~fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me~

RenaissanceRomanceRunsRed
Senior Member
since 2007-06-11
Posts 1062
In Love <3
3 posted 2007-06-14 08:35 PM


Chris, you got talent, wow. love it. and you do not suck! (only i can say i suck, lol)

-Red

I stuck my bare hand into your rip cage and fished around until I found your heart ripped it out tore it apart while saying You dont need this anymore

Clockwork_Orange
Senior Member
since 2007-03-23
Posts 620
Space Camp, IN
4 posted 2007-06-14 08:46 PM


dude...wow.....just wow......all i can say is wow.
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