Wide, innocent eyes - pipTalk Forums

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pen&paper
Senior Member

since 2006-06-06

Posts 513

0 posted 2007-06-07 11:40 AM

Can you see her?
The girl with those wide innocent eyes
Can you hear her?
The way she laughs
The way she speaks
What do you feel when she walks by?

Sometimes I wonder
How you’d get along
Somehow I know
She’d be the words to your song

She’s everything you’ve ever wanted
You’re everything she needs
She hears your every word
The way she laughs
The way she speaks
Do you remember every
Golden word she says?
She sees you
She wants to know you

Sometimes I wonder
How you get along
Somehow I know
She’s the words
To your favourite song

Do you love that girl?
With those wide, innocent eyes?
Do you hear the words she says?
She talks bout you
Thinks bout you
Can’t stand bein’ without you

Could you look into her wide, innocent, icy-blue eyes?
And tell her
She’s everything you’ve ever wanted
You remember every golden word she’s ever said
You can’t stand bein’ without her
You want to start and never end
Can you see yourself in those wide, innocent eyes?

BrittanyJ
Member

since 2007-06-03

Posts 461
Come find me?

1 posted 2007-06-07 04:43 PM

Wow! nicely writen! i loved how you made the lines flow. It's a very deep poem.

Life is not a matter of destiny, but a matter of choice.

WaterFairy103
Member

since 2006-05-31

Posts 196

2 posted 2007-06-07 08:12 PM

"Somehow I know
She’d be the words to your song"

My personal favorite line. EXCELLENTLY written, I really love it! Good flow and a lot of emotion behind it. Good job!

I've stopped fighting my inner demons... we're on the same side now.

surf_painter
Member

since 2007-04-10

Posts 434
Canada

3 posted 2007-06-07 11:49 PM

very nice i liked how in the end he also wanted her just as much another wonderful i'm going to say song becuase that is what it appeared to be but if it is a poem i apologize for saying song anyways it was very brilliant

hunnie_girl

Member Elite

since 2006-06-18

Posts 2567
Canada

4 posted 2007-06-12 12:22 PM

Wow liked the flow and thought in this

hunnie.

~fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me~

MegMeg
Member

since 2007-05-14

Posts 85
Virginia

5 posted 2007-06-12 11:35 AM

lovely.....just lovely

RenaissanceRomanceRunsRed
Senior Member

since 2007-06-11

Posts 1062
In Love <3

6 posted 2007-06-12 09:01 PM

woah, i loved it.

Sometimes I wonder
How you’d get along
Somehow I know
She’d be the words to your song

talent in lyric form girl. woah-o. nice stuff girl , real nice stuff. it sounds so nice. i've written things like it- they barely compare pen

they barely compare . . .

-RED-a-la

I stuck my bare hand into your rip cage and fished around until I found your heart ripped it out tore it apart while saying You dont need this anymore

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