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Teen Poetry #8
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rhia_5779
Senior Member
since 2006-06-09
Posts 1334
California

0 posted 2007-05-24 02:09 PM



How do I get the guts to tell you?
When I'm scared you'll laugh.
Or that you won't believe its true
And will just put it in the past.


I wish you could see
What I can't convey
Seems obvious to me.
Tell me what to say.

You lead me on but you don't know it.
I think there's a chance but then you ruin it.
Never know what is serious with you,
I believe you when it can't be true.

I am your friend, and always will be.
Even if you know it shouldn't change a thing,
But reason just won't agree with me.
Right now I don't know what this should mean.

If only common sense would kick in,
But life is determined to torture me.
And you will never read this whim.
I don't even know what I want to be.

If only.
But know that's just a dream.

© Copyright 2007 rhia_5779 - All Rights Reserved
surf_painter
Member
since 2007-04-10
Posts 434
Canada
1 posted 2007-05-24 10:13 PM


i liked it it had beat but i'm not sure what sturck me as different there was just a different feel to this poem when i read it good job though
jayjara
Member
since 2007-05-02
Posts 90
Florida
2 posted 2007-05-24 10:46 PM


Nice beat to it. I think it needs one more stanza, though. And I think the poem goes great w/o the last two lines

-J

hunnie_girl
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2006-06-18
Posts 2567
Canada
3 posted 2007-05-25 05:48 PM


really liked this... Cna relate a lot.
hunnie.

~fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me~

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