navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #8 » Stand up
Teen Poetry #8
Post A Reply Post New Topic Stand up Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
Belinda
Member
since 2006-01-30
Posts 126
UK

0 posted 2006-10-31 06:58 AM



I'm here and making a change,
No more falling to the ground.
I'm going to stand up for myself,
No longer shall I make no sound.

If you don't like me, that's okay.
If you think I'm ugly, look away.
If I talk rubbish, close your ears.
If my style scares you, face your fears.

Sick of all these stereotypes,
I want only to be free,
Sick of living to fit in,
I just want to be me..

If If you hate me, I don't care.
If my hair's blinding, try not to stare.
If I smell bad, turn around,
If my shoes suck, why look at the ground?

To all you looser's,
Who want a constant fight.
Get over yourselves,
and take a hike !


© Copyright 2006 Belinda Black - All Rights Reserved
Belinda
Member
since 2006-01-30
Posts 126
UK
1 posted 2006-10-31 07:45 AM


repeated word !! sowi hehe

Expect nothing, Prepare for anything.

rhia_5779
Senior Member
since 2006-06-09
Posts 1334
California
2 posted 2006-10-31 05:04 PM


No longer shall I make no sound.

Here I think this should change, it sounds bad with a double negative. Reconfigure that a bit.

Loved these

If you don't like me, that's okay.
If you think I'm ugly, look away.
If I talk rubbish, close your ears.
If my style scares you, face your fears.

Sick of all these stereotypes,
I want only to be free,
Sick of living to fit in,
I just want to be me..

If If you hate me, I don't care.
If my hair's blinding, try not to stare.
If I smell bad, turn around,
If my shoes suck, why look at the ground?

To all you looser's,
Who want a constant fight.
Get over yourselves,
and take a hike !


******** Says it all, amazing piece of work.
Also, the end of it, nice finished ending but the end the rhyming was kinda off.



Belinda
Member
since 2006-01-30
Posts 126
UK
3 posted 2006-11-01 08:27 AM


Yeah, I think you're right I'll try to change that .. any suggestions.. anyone?

Thank you! xD

Yup I think I should change that, doesn't quite sound right.

Belinda~x

hunnie_girl
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2006-06-18
Posts 2567
Canada
4 posted 2006-11-06 11:16 PM


very nice flow, and understood this well
hunnie

A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war and a time for peace   ~Ecclesiastes 3:8~

Tempest
Member
since 2006-04-28
Posts 247
dont eat paint chips!!!!
5 posted 2006-11-08 09:14 PM


loved it!
Belinda
Member
since 2006-01-30
Posts 126
UK
6 posted 2006-11-22 06:19 PM


thanks.it was an interesting poem for me to write with a new subject. It's about bullying but I have never personally been bullied however I have a few friends who have been bullied in the past and it's always hard to beat the bullies, but I have helped a cuple of my friends. So this might not be your thing .. but yeah!

Belinda~x

Expect nothing, Prepare for anything.

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #8 » Stand up

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary