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Teen Poetry #8
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Tempest
Member
since 2006-04-28
Posts 247
dont eat paint chips!!!!

0 posted 2006-10-23 07:15 PM


illusions of a semantic hope
looming from the light
perceptuous disaccord
should i just give up the fight

lost and wondering
inside of my own head
i hear it over and over
those words that you said

im now alone
sitting in my room
debating with myself
if i should fall asleep soon

a pad of paper in front of me
and a dull pencil in my hand
writing my soul onto the paper
i try to forget, but cant

forsken by my own thoughts
falling through the space
lost in the moment
poetry is the only escape

[This message has been edited by Tempest (10-23-2006 08:10 PM).]

© Copyright 2006 Bryan Girton - All Rights Reserved
RevengeIsMine
Senior Member
since 2006-07-08
Posts 820
Australia
1 posted 2006-10-23 08:17 PM


Tempest,
Great Poem...
BTW if u seriously wanted to slap me U'd have to travel a fairly long way and when u got here well then it would take forever to find me with so many attractive girls in this country.. LOL

Warmest Luv and Kisses,
Jessica

Renegade
Junior Member
since 2006-10-21
Posts 22

2 posted 2006-10-23 08:24 PM


so true to me

you do an unaturally good job with this but insert some words here and there becaues the rhythym is just a tad bit off


hunnie_girl
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2006-06-18
Posts 2567
Canada
3 posted 2006-10-24 12:23 PM


i can very much relate to this poem, i've been there many times before i loved this piece. thanks for sharing...
hunnie*

A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war and a time for peace   ~Ecclesiastes 3:8~

PoetrySinger
Member
since 2006-10-16
Posts 54

4 posted 2006-10-24 10:29 AM


hey I'm hot but a better poet is how I'd like to be known not by my looks so just check out my poetry pride by reading what I write


Clockwork_Orange
Senior Member
since 2007-03-23
Posts 620
Space Camp, IN
5 posted 2007-06-20 06:46 PM


your the best writer in the world.
RenaissanceRomanceRunsRed
Senior Member
since 2007-06-11
Posts 1062
In Love <3
6 posted 2007-06-20 08:03 PM


amazing, and so relateable. i think it is so cool that guys like you and orage are man enough to share poetry with the rest of us. funny, you men seem to surpass all us women. fabulous job tempest.

-Red

Inigo Montoya: You seem a decent fellow. I hate to kill you.
Westley: You seem a decent fellow. I hate to die.

Dooglam
New Member
since 2007-06-20
Posts 5
Pasadena, CA
7 posted 2007-06-20 09:30 PM


hey man that was pretty good. i like it.
surf_painter
Member
since 2007-04-10
Posts 434
Canada
8 posted 2007-06-21 06:25 PM


i think your poem describes the way most poets feel that they may escape in their poems to help themselves out another good poem
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