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rhia_5779
Senior Member

since 2006-06-09

Posts 1334
California

0 posted 2006-10-18 04:46 PM

This is a song. At school , I go to a international school so we have to do a U.N thing. For music class we had to write a song about having a home. This was partially written by my friend and mostly by me. I used two of her ideas in this. She pretty much just fooled around while she was sopposed to be writing ideas for it. She got around five and I used maybe two. ITs not great, and I don't really have a tune for it.
********

The place you live,
where you’re known.
A safe haven,
untouchable in your home

Feeling protected,
where children can stay to grow
in one place for a while.
Not having to always be on the go.

Not having to go through harsh changes.
Innocent faces, and dry eyes,
shielded from the pain,
kept away from reasons to cry.

Not being broken, or torn to shreds,
unhardened with a whole heart.
Staying unruffled, and not dead,
safely away from the gunshots.

The place you live,
where you’re known.
A safe haven,
untouchable in your home.

Cracking shots break open their sleepless night,
hearts of mothers already shattered crack once more.
Shafts of light fall on sleeping faces, opening their eyes.
Smell of burning flesh, smoked burns waft in the door.

Shelter that will not fall,
won’t collapse into pieces on the ground.
Children playing safely alone on the dusty street.
A system that doesn’t come creaking down.

Alone in wreckage and ruins of what once was a home.
Ears never to hear another person speak.
noOne that cares, forced to forage the wild.
Just a child tears staining her dirty cheeks.

An unfinished dream

The place you live,
where you’re known.
A safe haven,
Untouchable in your home.

[This message has been edited by rhia_5779 (10-20-2006 10:37 AM).]

tapper798
Member

since 2003-07-20

Posts 353
My own world

1 posted 2006-10-19 11:15 PM

I like this concept alot. A lot of people(much including myself here) only write about feelings, about love, so it's refreshing to see something that's about something we all take for granted. Good job.

AIM-beatufu1tragidy

Tell me what you think about being open, about being honest with yourself.

DreamerSpirit
Member

since 2006-10-02

Posts 240
Buenos Aires, Argentina

2 posted 2006-10-20 12:44 PM

i really enjoyed reading this poem..
it caught me from the first to the last word..
good writing.

hunnie_girl

Member Elite

since 2006-06-18

Posts 2567
Canada

3 posted 2006-10-21 11:33 PM

very well writeen i think it will make an awesome song.
hunnie*

A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war and a time for peace ~Ecclesiastes 3:8~

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