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Open Poetry #44
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Salt and Woodsmoke
| Open Poetry #44 |
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Salt and Woodsmoke |
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AlluraD Junior Member
since 2009-05-06
Posts 28Florida |
Don't keep the roses fresh upon my grave, a vacant shell is all that's there to grieve. Beloved, feel me beating in your heart, my spirit lives as long as you believe. I know you longed to take me in your arms, to keep me near, to mend with every glance. But I am still as close as every breath, remember how we lived the word romance. I see the tears and shadows in your eyes, the open shock of truths you disbelieve. I'll linger here like trembling autumn days until you let me go, I will not leave. Come hold my salt and wood smoke in your hands, I will not try to run or turn away, but rest upon your palms when night descends, till light rebinds the fragile ties of day. Dreams spill again, they shimmer on your cheeks, upon the stricken canvas of your face, through parted lips you taste them on your tongue as fingers sift through memories and lace. But surely as each passing season turns, with certainty beyond what men can see, I will remain, the ring on hand, in heart-- until you find the peace to set me free. |
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| © Copyright 2009 Lou Davies-James - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Pilgrimage Member Elite
since 2001-12-04
Posts 3945Texas, USA |
I came to look at this one because the title grabbed me. I'm glad it did, because the poem wouldn't let me go. This is elegantly phrased, smoothly metered and nicely rhymed. Nan (Pilgrim variety) |
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Osprey Member
since 2009-04-12
Posts 249 |
This is special. I've read your poem numerous times before posting this reply, and there will be many more readings to come. Thank you. |
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ThisDiamond Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353Michigan, USA |
A most excellent, most reverent psalm. |
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unboundpoetess Member
since 2008-05-24
Posts 477 |
Haunting lyric. I'll linger here like trembling autumn days until you let me go, I will not leave. but rest upon your palms when night descends, till light rebinds the fragile ties of day. just a sampling of what I love here. Looking forward to future glances, Heather |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
This is so very lovely... Like Pilgrimage, I was drawn by the title... and was then enchanted by your words. Welcome to Passions! *S* |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Another fine poet has joined our pip "Family of Friends"!  I thoroughly enjoyed your poetic offering! I will be on the lookout for more ~ to be sure!!! Giving you a warm, welcoming pip hug, Earth Angel  |
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
quote: How absolutely beautiful! Welcome to Pip! Love, Margherita |
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Rex Member
since 2000-06-29
Posts 482Houston, Texas |
Beautifully done. Bravo. Regards. |
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steavenr Member Elite
since 2003-11-17
Posts 4058 |
I, too, was drawn in by your 'allur'-ing title, but you kept me with your words. Obviously inspired, this write drips with that kind of hope that mesmerizes the reader. I fell in love with these lines: "Come hold my salt and wood smoke in your hands, I will not try to run or turn away, but rest upon your palms when night descends, till light rebinds the fragile ties of day." ...primo, simply primo |
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collins613 Junior Member
since 2009-05-08
Posts 15NYC, NY |
I loved these lines best. When I read them I involuntarily opened my mouth and expected to taste something! Dreams spill again, they shimmer on your cheeks, upon the stricken canvas of your face, through parted lips you taste them on your tongue |
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Kaoru
since 2003-06-07
Posts 3892where the wild flowers grow |
Agreeing with the others here, such a feel to this that is ethereal. I loved the first verse, the rest complimented it beautifully. Well done. |
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Marchmadness Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271So. El Monte, California |
Looking forward to more of your beautiful poetry. This is excellent. Ida |
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Alison
since 2008-01-27
Posts 9318Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy! |
I read your poem yesterday and I think I dreamed about these lines quote: They are beautiful - just wonderfully written. Thank you for sharing, Alison |
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