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Open Poetry #44
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critical mass
Member
since 2009-03-25
Posts 275
Michigan

0 posted 2009-04-12 10:58 PM


Hungry hand me downs
listen to a sermon
meant for those
who have silver for the plate
full bellies and wing-tip shoes

"God can see all the children,
they shine bright-  
like stars in the night sky.
Jesus loves and watches over them."
Amen

He is seven going on sixteen,
waiting for a gaze that never comes.
They aren't shiny enough
for God to see.

Daddy knows the truth.
There is no God.
Momma prays,
irons neighbors clothes,
feeds rice to hobo's on the front step.
Red, green and blue food coloring
makes todays rice look different
from yesterdays and tomorrows.

When he was eight he heard a sermon
"God helps them who help themselves"
and all the amens pass them by
bibles in hand looking at the sidewalk.
Little changes year to year.

At eight he becomes his own savior.

God lives across the street
and doesn't know he's here.

[This message has been edited by critical mass (04-13-2009 05:46 AM).]

© Copyright 2009 critical mass - All Rights Reserved
suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
1 posted 2009-04-13 12:04 PM


When he was eight he heard a sermon
"God helps them who help themselves"
and all the amens pass them by
bibles in hand looking at the sidewalk.

Your words fill me with gratitude that I grew up in a place where people walked with open eyes and generous hearts and lived their faith... So very many don't.

critical mass
Member
since 2009-03-25
Posts 275
Michigan
2 posted 2009-04-14 04:24 AM


thanks for the reply.

Funny how religion fits your needs.

A friend of mine dressed as a homeless person
with his two kids. They stood outside our church on the lawn. No one spoke to them. Very few even acknowledged they were there. They were escorted off the property by the police. I got it on video. The church now helps the homeless in our area.

Some people just don't want to know or care.

unboundpoetess
Member
since 2008-05-24
Posts 477

3 posted 2009-04-14 07:50 PM


I imagine the next service after that happened was interesting.

I read a hopeless kind of empty here.
Evocative.

Heather

SEA
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676
with you
4 posted 2009-04-14 08:10 PM


not all people who go to church are as uncaring, but too many unfortunately, are.

this is good...

Osprey
Member
since 2009-04-12
Posts 249

5 posted 2009-04-15 05:54 AM


From my understanding of religion, gods can only operate through their creations: if the brain can't move the hand, the nose ain't getting scratched. At eight years of age, someone got very wise to this.
There's no hiding place for hypocrisy when there's a hidden camera in action.
A thought-provoking, nicely-delivered poem that almost becomes a parable, when read together with your first reply. Thank you.

Dog
Junior Member
since 2009-04-09
Posts 48
England
6 posted 2009-04-15 06:16 AM


interesting thoughts, thats a good write, like Heather said i bet the following service was interesting after that incident ?
Bill Charles
Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619
highways, & byways, for now
7 posted 2009-04-15 07:58 PM


critical mass - I've enjoyed your writings, and hope to see more of them...

BC

Boshii2
Member
since 2009-02-01
Posts 146

8 posted 2009-04-15 10:47 PM


loved each and every word
love your church also
but of course your church is you.
Kind regards  Boshii2

critical mass
Member
since 2009-03-25
Posts 275
Michigan
9 posted 2009-04-16 07:39 PM


unboundpoetess

Actually I mailed it to the church. It took two weeks. Didn't want them to know it was me.


SEA

You are right, not all are, but in a southern Mississippi town things are different.
Osprey

You are right, God was never really what this poem was about.
Dog

It was interesting.


Bill Charles

coming soon to a theater near you.


Boshii2

glad you liked this.
I'll let the church know.


Thank you all for you kind replies.


CM


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