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Open Poetry #44
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Huan Yi
Member Ascendant
since 2004-10-12
Posts 6688
Waukegan

0 posted 2009-04-02 01:56 PM


.


Wind moves
As it never has
The willow’s leaves
The tips of whose branches
Are like fingers brushing
The surface of a still pool

Isn’t there now
Someone humming
In a distance not far away
An old Celtic tune softly
About beauty young love
And home

A romantic heart
That’s not yet dead
Always has this need
To flesh a void  To fill
With stars and flowers
Other symbols magical
Any empty space
Within its cloth

And you—my yet
Sensuous anonymous
Still absent any
Fact or experience
That might dispel
The myth

Of tints and shades
I’ve made in which
You now reside

Never take it off


.



© Copyright 2009 John Pawlik - All Rights Reserved
Marchmadness
Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271
So. El Monte, California
1 posted 2009-04-02 03:16 PM


This has an ethereal quality to it, beautiful.
                           Ida

Pilgrimage
Member Elite
since 2001-12-04
Posts 3945
Texas, USA
2 posted 2009-04-02 03:25 PM


Oh, I like this.  You evoke the dream I no longer dream.

Nan (Pilgrim variety)

1slick_lady
Member Ascendant
since 2000-12-22
Posts 6088
standing on a shadow's lace
3 posted 2009-04-02 04:09 PM


i like the whole poem but
this
i like best
"A romantic heart
That’s not yet dead
Always has this need
To flesh a void  To fill
With stars and flowers
Other symbols magical
Any empty space
Within its cloth

And you—my yet
Sensuous anonymous
Still absent any
Fact or experience
That might dispel
The myth

Of tints and shades
I’ve made in which
You now reside

Never take it off"

Huan Yi
Member Ascendant
since 2004-10-12
Posts 6688
Waukegan
4 posted 2009-04-02 07:49 PM


.


Thank you all

Helen,

The trick is knowing
that it's only you that's doing it.

Thanks all again,

John

.

secondhanddreampoet
Member Ascendant
since 2006-11-07
Posts 6394
a 'Universalist' !
5 posted 2009-04-03 04:49 PM


Even if I am accused of ‘bias’ [as a person of v. proud Celtic
ancestry (and an unabashedly ‘incurable Romantic)] …

I simply must say THIS is the absolute best of your work that I have read to date! …

I will not ‘hi-lite’ a specific part … as it is grand-fine from beginning to end!

Resounding/long-sustained applause for this wonderful ‘penning’  !!

Huan Yi
Member Ascendant
since 2004-10-12
Posts 6688
Waukegan
6 posted 2009-04-03 07:12 PM




Bruce:

"I simply must say THIS is the absolute best of your work that I have read to date! …"


That's high praise . . .
I will keep it in mind when I'm
deciding what to submit to the Illinois State
Poetry Society for their website in May,
(XIV was for March),

Thanks again
I will not forget

John


Midnitesun
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
7 posted 2009-04-03 09:30 PM


That opening alone is worth an applause, John. A wonderfully written piece, with superb imagery.
suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
8 posted 2009-04-04 11:42 AM


A romantic heart
That’s not yet dead
Always has this need
To flesh a void  To fill
With stars and flowers
Other symbols magical
Any empty space
Within its cloth

How very true... how magnificently written!

unboundpoetess
Member
since 2008-05-24
Posts 477

9 posted 2009-04-07 12:34 PM


This piece of beautiful would have my vote for your Poetry Society. There is not a single line that I didn't love here.

Absolutely stunning.
Heather

Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348
Florida
10 posted 2009-04-07 12:40 PM


"A romantic heart
That’s not yet dead
Always has this need.."


ah, then my heart is not dead as I suspected.

Well done.

"too bad ignorance isn't painful"
~Unknown~

secondhanddreampoet
Member Ascendant
since 2006-11-07
Posts 6394
a 'Universalist' !
11 posted 2009-04-16 09:17 PM


I would like to see this superb 'penning' return, for
awhile at least, near the top of the "P.I.P.-land queue!

continuing applause for this 'write' !!

Huan Yi
Member Ascendant
since 2004-10-12
Posts 6688
Waukegan
12 posted 2009-04-16 09:22 PM


.


Well Bruce,

You've pretty much
made it a moral obligation
for me to post it as my submission
to the Illinois State Poetry site,
and I will dedicate to you.

Thanks

John

.

secondhanddreampoet
Member Ascendant
since 2006-11-07
Posts 6394
a 'Universalist' !
13 posted 2009-04-16 09:30 PM


I will be most honored by said dedication!

I hope this poem does very well [it (and you) assuredly deserve major recognition]


steavenr
Member Elite
since 2003-11-17
Posts 4058

14 posted 2009-04-16 10:27 PM


you have unveiled for us sheer beauty....nice
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