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Open Poetry #44
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Juju
Member Elite
since 2003-12-29
Posts 3429
In your dreams

0 posted 2009-03-27 08:24 PM


Dust

The time
When we become dust
Then we will finally be
Together again
Yet free

Juju



-Juju

-"So you found a girl
Who thinks really deep thoughts
What's so amazing about really deep thoughts " Silent all these Years, Tori Amos

© Copyright 2009 Juju - All Rights Reserved
Huan Yi
Member Ascendant
since 2004-10-12
Posts 6688
Waukegan
1 posted 2009-03-27 08:27 PM


.


Juju


I don't know as you need
"still" in the last line. . .
("yet free" is better as a last line;
don't change that).


John



Juju
Member Elite
since 2003-12-29
Posts 3429
In your dreams
2 posted 2009-03-27 08:27 PM


Hah solved line one!



-Juju

-"So you found a girl
Who thinks really deep thoughts
What's so amazing about really deep thoughts " Silent all these Years, Tori Amos

Huan Yi
Member Ascendant
since 2004-10-12
Posts 6688
Waukegan
3 posted 2009-03-27 08:33 PM


.


PS

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CxH7FlFfqEw


Good for you

John

.

ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
4 posted 2009-03-27 09:23 PM


Well let's hope you don't get discovered by a Red Devil passing by.

Very interesting concept.

Eric

Margherita
Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236
Eternity
5 posted 2009-03-29 05:39 AM


On soul level you are always free, no need to wait till you are dust. I do understand though ...

Your thought is well expressed.

Love,
Margherita

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
6 posted 2009-03-29 06:41 AM


Your words are on my mind today~~


M

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
7 posted 2009-03-29 08:53 AM


Hi, Juju.

I would like to echo Margherita's response, verbatim.


Linda

Artic Wind
Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080
Realm of Supernatural
8 posted 2009-03-29 11:31 AM


Enjoyed the thoughts of Juju!


ARCTIC WIND

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
9 posted 2009-03-29 12:38 PM


Jules, great little write here!

wow

Noel
Junior Member
since 2009-03-06
Posts 42
West Coast
10 posted 2009-03-29 12:45 PM


Very nice.  Love the concept!
BluesSerenade
Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549
By the Seaside
11 posted 2009-03-29 09:59 PM


I'm kind of on the same page today.

Nice write, Juju~

Chalmette Guy
Senior Member
since 2009-03-11
Posts 1257
Louisiana
12 posted 2009-03-30 09:05 AM


Loved this. It speaks volumes to me.
Robert E. Jordan
Member Rara Avis
since 2008-01-25
Posts 8541
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
13 posted 2009-03-30 09:28 AM


Yo dear Juju,

The nice thought is there, and the idea has possibilities if your cremated and the ashes cast to the wind.

Love Bobby

Dark Star
Member
since 2008-02-20
Posts 392
Lost in your eyes
14 posted 2009-03-30 10:57 AM


I like it
i_am_patch!
Member
since 2008-06-24
Posts 108
manila, philippines
15 posted 2009-04-07 07:22 PM


well im checking all your poems juju..
you are intense..and fresh.
i feel this one especially.

   "omnia vincit amor"
LOVE OVERCOMES EVERYTHING

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