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Windhover
Member
since 2003-11-17
Posts 179
UK

0 posted 2009-03-16 07:19 PM





I wish that I could write a poem... words that would intrigue your heart;
no trite clichés... like 'Moon' and 'June'...
but, where on earth then, do I start?
The words I prospect from the heart... a soft, seductive rhapsody,
on paper... just don't read that way, although I weave them carefully.

I wish that I could craft some verse to tug the heartstrings, every time;
smooth and silky... sweet perfection; flawless meter... perfect rhyme.
But as I rummage round all the romantic bric-a-brac inside...
and thoughts come tumbling out, and change to words; it cannot be denied...

they whisper down the page... not making sense... refusing to comply
with all the rules, real poets follow; very strange... I wonder why?
Perhaps, I'm not a real poet... bereft of creativity...
perhaps, it is all froth and whimsy that I weave... not poetry.

But then, the rigid, classical approach is not what I seek, here;
the Cinquains and the Quatrains... bound with rules, by which they must adhere.
I cannot pigeon-hole the thoughts, the dreams... that just is not the way
the hopeless, lost romantic, works...
at least, not this one... not today.

The trouble is; the heart-thoughts,and the mind-thoughts seem to disagree,
the heart says, "This is what I feel... yes, this is what she means to me."
The mind-thoughts say... "No, that's too flowery... far too smooth and syrupy"...
What the hell... I'll listen to my heart...
those thoughts won't mislead me.

Damn! I've dropped the thread... forgot the chain of thought... the plot, mislaid;
all this psycho-twaddle snuffed out one more bright hope...
I'm afraid
tonight is not the night... perhaps, tomorrow I can make a start
on a pretty little poem, that might just
intrigue your heart.





© Copyright 2009 Windhover - All Rights Reserved
Earth Angel
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since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
1 posted 2009-03-16 07:41 PM


Our minds and pens might rhyme ~ but not cecessarily our hearts! I think I would prefer receiving a love poem from the latter.

~ and that's a good thing! Since most of the love 'poems' that I have received were not written by poets!

I enjoyed this unstructured spill from your own heart. Mine was indeed, "intrigued"! lol


Linda

Midnitesun
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Gaia
2 posted 2009-03-16 08:13 PM


This intrigues plenty!
Put the 'form and function' pen down, don't worry so much about style.
Just write straight from the and the words will be right.

ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353
Michigan, USA
3 posted 2009-03-16 08:22 PM


Love falls from the heart in the truest of cascade.  It needs not adornment, or adjustment...it is a whisper at dawn, perfume to the wrist, bare shoulder and backless... It is the heartbeat that stutters, and screams... pure in its fascination and delight.
What a lovely unchained rhapsody you have begun.

A Romantic Heart
Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-03
Posts 5496
Forever In Your Heart
4 posted 2009-03-17 01:14 AM


Your poetry always intrigues my heart

~HUGS

~ARH

A Romantic Heart
Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-03
Posts 5496
Forever In Your Heart
5 posted 2009-03-17 05:07 AM



Artic Wind
Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080
Realm of Supernatural
6 posted 2009-03-17 12:46 PM


Enjoyed the Write!


ARCTIC WIND
HAPPY ST.PATRICK'S DAY

Sunshine
Administrator
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since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
7 posted 2009-03-17 05:23 PM


quote:
perhaps, tomorrow I can make a start
on a pretty little poem, that might just
intrigue your heart.

I think you'll succeed.

No, that's wrong. I know you will!





moonbeam
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since 2005-12-24
Posts 2356

8 posted 2009-03-17 06:50 PM


Windhover

I wonder why they have to be mutually exclusive?  Why can the "thoughts" of the heart not be given expression by the mind?

All the most effective poems I've ever read seem to do exactly that.  It just takes a little work and effort .

And btw "heart" is the biggest cliche of them all , but then you knew that!

Also you have ellipsesitus - do you really need them all!?

M

Suncleaver
Member
since 2009-01-18
Posts 481
Stafford England
9 posted 2009-03-17 07:02 PM


A beautiful expression of a poets dlemna.

I'd say listen to the heart. The rules just give structure to substance. Without the substance there can be no structure.

And why try and scaffold a pure expression from the heart anyway?

Best regards, Luke.

Never sigh for a better world, it's already composed, played and told.

moonbeam
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10 posted 2009-03-17 07:32 PM


I'd say listen to the heart too.  

I'm not sure where these "rules" have come from.  I didn't mention rules.  There are no rules in poetry, except the rules you ought to learn before you break or ignore all the rules .

Writing poetry "from the heart" without any craft or skill or thought is imho a recipe for sameness, a recipe for cliche, a sure path to non-communication.

Nobody is I hope suggesting expressions "from the heart" should be "scaffolded", that has a horrid pejorative ring to it, but having the heart thoughts is one thing, expressing them in writing in a way that will interest others is quite another.  That imv has to be learnt, or copied, or influenced by tradition.

Or perhaps you think that Keats, Eliot, Poe, Frost, Oliver, Olds, Paterson, Heaney, et al, all wrote "from the heart" without any "head" or consideration of the skills associated with a poetic effort?



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