navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #44 » Faded
Open Poetry #44
Post A Reply Post New Topic Faded Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
ecrivan
Member Elite
since 2001-12-10
Posts 3923
my own state

0 posted 2009-02-27 11:58 PM


Would you be a valentine
when degrees of sentiment
grow listless under painstaking
flat image choices
tonight..a romantic theme
begins but as love wains
so families tear
at their seams

No subject to catch on
the room turns in on itself
its texture once bright fades
its elements surrounded by disuse
as bows cannot be loaded
with heart topped arrows
they have yet to be flexed
for a target to be won.

Yet objects may be reached
by the heartless
with no love..no hate
but in between
proud of shallow gains
somewhere looking for a mark
finding scratches
on faded pictures
of love diverted from another country
with another relative
whoever that was


Before all those photos
got stuck in the album
the children were to decide
who to keep
as if the people on paper
could be so divided
in between spoilers of
proud collections
no subject to catch on
or target to be won
heart topped arrows
cannot be loaded
on the bows of worn
beach scenes and studio shots
that cannot be stretched.
to the present day.


[This message has been edited by ecrivan (02-28-2009 03:33 PM).]

© Copyright 2009 Martin Dansky - All Rights Reserved
Margherita
Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236
Eternity
1 posted 2009-02-28 05:19 AM


Dear Martin, this is absolutely impressive and heartwrenching. Well written,  the melancholy is rendered so powerfully.

Love and warmth.
Margherita

SEA
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676
with you
2 posted 2009-02-28 11:14 AM


"no subject to catch on
the room turns in on itself
its texture once bright fades
its elements surrounded by disuse
as bows cannot be loaded
with heart topped arrows
they have yet to be flexed
for a target to be won."

wow...this is great...is it me or have you been gone awhile? anyway, it's good to read you again. I think this is one of your best.


ecrivan
Member Elite
since 2001-12-10
Posts 3923
my own state
3 posted 2009-02-28 03:30 PM


Some chose romance for their themes straight away, I chose melancholy to bring out the need for that. Yes I have been writing as often as I should...pleasure to be back again
Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #44 » Faded

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary