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Open Poetry #44
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LindsayP
Member Elite
since 2007-07-28
Posts 3410
Australia, Victoria

0 posted 2009-02-26 08:11 PM



             A priest & a Rabbi

A Jewish Rabbi and  priest met one day on a walk
When Father Murphy asked this question direct,
“I understand your religion forbids you to eat pork,”
The Rabbi’s head nodded, saying, “that is correct.”

“Just between you and me,” the good Father inquired,
“Have you tasted pork when no one was looking,”
“I have,” said the Rabbi, seeming quite uninspired
“But I’m inclined to think it needed more cooking.”

After a few moments of thought the Rabbi then said,
“I hear that in your religion that sex is forbidden,”
“To we priests, that is true, for we are unable to wed,
But it is not a fact that we try to keep hidden.”

The Rabbi then said , “ just between you and me,
Have you ever had sexual intercourse unintended,”
“As a matter of fact I have,” said Father Murphy
“But strict silence on that score is recommended.”

The Rabbi’s silence at once was sincerely assured
And then before he continued  with any more talk,
Giving Father a nudge with this confession procured
He said, “ it’s a bl++dy sight better than pork.”

© Copyright 2009 Lindsay P Wilson - All Rights Reserved
Robert E. Jordan
Member Rara Avis
since 2008-01-25
Posts 8541
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
1 posted 2009-02-26 08:23 PM


Yo LindsayP,

Nothing is better than pork.  

Check the work of Charles Lamb.

Bobby

WindWalker
Senior Member
since 2001-10-12
Posts 1218

2 posted 2009-02-26 09:00 PM


I love this one.
Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
3 posted 2009-02-26 09:29 PM


Hmmm, methinks I'd prefer to be a Rabbi.

Good'un, Aussie Man! lol

Loveya!
Linda

ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
4 posted 2009-02-26 10:14 PM


Yes, yes, much better than pork.

I loved that unintended part....He he it's amazing what a feller can do to make excuses for himself.

When all those hidden sexual revelations were going on in the catholic church the comedian Dennis Miller made a joke.
He said, "I decided to go to confession today so I went to the church and went in the booth to confess.
The priest spoke out through the screen and said, 'would you like to confess your sins son?' "I thought about it for a minute and then said, 'you go FIRST!'"

Good one Lindsay

Eric

tao power
Member
since 2009-02-24
Posts 109

5 posted 2009-02-27 02:17 AM


always refreshing to read some humorous lyrical verse.  

The punchline was good, but I think it could be better if you could fit a better rhyme for pork than "talk".  A comedian will tell you that a stutter on the punchline kills the joke.  The forced rhyme reads like a bit of a stutter.

I'd prefer to read more of your poetry than the "i'm so sad" stuff i usually see (and might even be guilty of.)

I bet you're pretty quick with a limerick.

Roniece Dawson-Bruce
Member Ascendant
since 2000-01-29
Posts 5689
Sydney, Australia
6 posted 2009-02-27 04:29 AM


Dear Lindsay.. you always make me smile!
a great write my friend!

  love to you and your family, I hope you all continue to be safe from the fires xx  

Be kind at heart....for everyone you meet has their own battle to fight.........

Bill Charles
Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619
highways, & byways, for now
7 posted 2009-02-27 01:34 PM


Lindsay - I knew this was going to be a winner when I saw the title, and it is...

BC

LindsayP
Member Elite
since 2007-07-28
Posts 3410
Australia, Victoria
8 posted 2009-02-27 09:30 PM



Bobby thanks, I love a bit of roast pork myself.

WW I'm glad you liked it, thanks for dropping in.

Linda, I think you have it summed up pretty good, I'd soon be the Rabbi myself, thank you my dear.

Eric, you certainly got that right my friend
I loved your whole response. Thanks

Tao Power, It's good to see you putting your response to my poem. Thank you for that
I don't quite get your meaning about the stutter in the last line. I only put the two small crosses in to take the place of double oo's. thanks anyway.

Roniece, it's lovely to see your name in the response list, thank you dear lady and thank you for your concern re the bush fires
They got to within about eighteen Kilometers
from Kyneton so we were very fortunate.

Thanks Bill, I'm glad you got a laugh out of it, a good laugh does everyone a lot of good.

Lindsay


suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
9 posted 2009-03-06 03:30 PM


LOL... That it is!! *G*

Thoroughly enjoyed this... thanks for the grins!

Midnitesun
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
10 posted 2009-03-06 04:02 PM


a good one!
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
11 posted 2009-03-06 04:08 PM


Hugging you for writing this!



Loved it!

LindsayP
Member Elite
since 2007-07-28
Posts 3410
Australia, Victoria
12 posted 2009-03-06 08:58 PM



To my very good friends

Ruth, Karilea and Kacy, it always give me
A warm feeling of friendship when I see

your names in the response. Love you all
and thank you.

Lindsay

Marchmadness
Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271
So. El Monte, California
13 posted 2009-03-08 02:44 PM


You always make me laugh, Lindsay. The best medicine, as they say.
                             Ida

LindsayP
Member Elite
since 2007-07-28
Posts 3410
Australia, Victoria
14 posted 2009-03-09 07:20 PM



When I hear that you are laughing my dear

Then that makes me happy to. Thanks Ida.

Love to you.

Lindsay

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